The Season I Loved You Without You - Chapter 31

CHAPTER 31

The house of Go-yeo was something he’d known about for a while, but this was his first visit. At first glance, it looked like an upscale villa with a complicated entry process. 

Despite calling ahead, there was no answer from Go-yeo. He sent back the car he arrived in and asked the security guard for access to the house, but even that was not permitted. However, he did acknowledge that Go-yeo seemed to be absent. So, he waited.

There were unfamiliar evergreen trees surrounding the parking lot. He plucked a few of their leaves and crushed them between his fingers. They made a soft rustling sound as they fell. His hands were wet with sap. It had been a long time since he’d experienced such uncertain waiting.

In the past, the anticipation of Go-yeo returning with his merchandise filled this waiting with excitement, but now he wasn’t so sure. Would she return? He moved to a place without CCTV cameras and lit a cigarette. Despite his efforts, the uncomfortable feeling lingered subtly.

After ferrying a few more times, headlights flashed on the dark road. It was a white Bentley gifted by the chairman, meant for Go-yeo. The car, with Go-yeo at the wheel, stopped briefly as it passed by him. He approached the car and knocked on the passenger window.

“You’re late.”

Go-yeo, in the driver’s seat, rolled down the window and smirked at him.

“I’m not feeling well today, so cut me some slack.”

“Are you kidding me? Go back.”

Despite her cold response, he held onto the rising window.

“Look at my face. It’s pretty banged up.”

Upon closer inspection, Go-yeo noticed that Ji-hyuk’s face was indeed a mess. Nevertheless, Go-yeo remained firm without wavering.

“Ji-hyuk, stop it. Seriously.”

Another car approached from behind, and Go-yeo left Ji-hyuk behind, driving away. It wasn’t surprising that he knew about this house.

As she rode the elevator, she realized that this was the first time she’d seen Ji-hyuk so wounded. He had never been this disheveled, not even in his teens. She shook her head to clear her thoughts.

She took a long shower as usual. Sitting by the bedroom window with a cup of chamomile tea instead of alcohol, she turned off the indoor lights to enjoy the view outside.

Ji-hyuk rarely got excited about anything. He meticulously controlled himself and his surroundings. So, he didn’t have the temperament to hit someone in anger or retaliate if hit. If something like that ever happened, she wished he would deal with it legally, ruthlessly.

She was worried. He must have known he’d be rejected, yet he came all the way here. What could have happened?

“Go to the hospital.”

But he looked so worn out, and that answer wasn’t satisfying. During their marriage, she never had trouble sleeping or working this much. He couldn’t still be there, could he?

She paced by the window and pressed the call button. It was purely out of concern. Soon, Ji-hyuk picked up.

“Why are you like this today?”

– I’m still downstairs, so let me in.

“…Let’s talk over the phone.”

– …Hah. Go-yeo, I’m having a tough day.

She bit her lower lip. After hanging up, she sighed. She instructed the security team to let Ji-hyuk in.

“It seems hard for him to come in.”

Go-yeo frowned at the mess, which was even worse in the light. Ji-hyuk casually surveyed the house with an overly nonchalant attitude. While Go-yeo was in the kitchen, Ji-hyuk glanced out the window and then examined the paintings hanging on the wall with interest.

Ignoring his unnecessary remarks, Go-yeo set water and a first aid kit on the table. 

“Looks like George Condo’s paintings have increased. How did you manage to get the David’s painting?”

Go-yeo crossed her legs and sat on the sofa. Ji-hyuk approached her, smiling as if finding her cute. Go-yeo carefully applied ointment to the cracked corners of his lips and bruised areas as he sat beside her.

“…”

Ji-hyuk had been continuously gazing at Go-yeo’s face. Her calm gaze and freshly washed face looked innocent as she inspected his wounds.

Go-yeo knew it shouldn’t be like this, but she admitted to herself that her heart had softened. She was taken aback by his injured appearance and worried about what might have happened. Throughout her shower, her thoughts were consumed by him, leaving her no choice but to accept it.

“How did this happen?”

“It’s Chairman Moon’s birthday today. Went there, got annoyed, ended up fighting.”

Go-yeo looked at Ji-hyuk incredulously. What kind of trouble did he cause there? Was he being thoughtful?

“Are you crazy?”

“Probably?”

Ji-hyuk genuinely laughed as if enjoying himself.

“Oh… I feel like I’m alive now.”

Then, he leaned against the sofa, naturally brushing Go-yeo’s cheek and touching her earlobe. Her soft, fluffy ear touched his hand.

Go-yeo swatted Ji-hyuk’s hand away irritably.

“Leave now. Seriously, don’t come back.”

Ji-hyuk muttered tiredly.

“Go-yeo, remember when we went to France? We wandered around and ended up staying in a beautiful seaside village in Marseille for a long time. Shall we go back there? We can live in a large castle or mansion near the beach. You like that kind of thing, like a medieval princess.”

Moon Ji-hyuk was not a sentimental person. Even if it looked like he was living carelessly, it was all part of his plan, and divorce was the only thing missing from his plan.

“Snap out of it.”

Uttering something impulsive and unrealistic was not the answer.

“An engagement announcement is coming soon. And if this job goes well, can we be together then?”

He looked particularly worn out. 

“Moon Ji-hyuk, just live well with that person. That’s what you should do.”

It was a rare serious look from her.

“Can you do that?”

Go-yeo avoided his gaze and replied vaguely.

“I can. Stop with the melodrama. Just leave.”

Ji-hyuk gazed at Go-yeo with a lonely expression.

‘If it were as easy as you say, I would have done it by now.’

Ji-hyuk groped Go-yeo’s hand tightly, kissed the back of it, then abruptly let go as if he had been startled. Go-yeo avoided his gaze and pulled her hand away.

Ji-hyuk furrowed his brows, grasped Go-yeo’s chin, and turned her to face him. He stared at her insistently as if trying to delve into her depths. Go-yeo, feeling no strange sense of familiarity she had felt a while ago, thought it was just a misconception and closed her eyes, leaning against the sofa.

‘Really, there’s no shortage of sentimentality.’

Ji-hyuk thought as he looked at Go-yeo in her space. His sharp nerves naturally dulled in her presence. As he breathed in her scent, a sense of unfounded confidence washed over him, making everything seem okay.

Suddenly, Go-yeo glanced down at the now quiet Ji-hyuk. Seeing him slouched on the sofa as if asleep, she let out a small sigh. She debated whether to wake him but ended up just loosely covering him with a blanket. Leaving only a dim light on, she turned off the rest and headed upstairs. Before going up to the second floor, she glanced back at him once.

“…….”

In the bedroom, Go-yeo took a sleeping pill for the first time in a while. Although she didn’t like the artificial drowsiness brought on by sleeping pills, she felt it was necessary today.

She couldn’t help but think about him, even though it felt odd that Ji-hyuk was in this house. Regardless, the feeling of pity for him lingered. Despite keeping him in her heart, she knew that amidst all those emotions, it wasn’t just love; it was also compassion, camaraderie, affection, and lingering attachments.

Ji-hyuk was a lonely and solitary person. Whenever she saw him like that, she felt pity to the point where she wanted to embrace the young Ji-hyuk. Being with him was joyful and fulfilling. He always made her smile, so she felt like a friend, and after spending a long time together, she felt a familial closeness. The reason she missed all this was due to lingering attachments.

Go-yeo was nothing special, just an ordinary person. Because feelings were invisible, if they were visible, she would have discarded them. She let out a small, drawn-out sigh.

She lazily lay down on the bed. Go-yeo thought of another man who had kissed the back of her hand not long ago.

That audacious guy who said he’d replace Ji-hyuk. The one who waited futilely until her return. The one who stubbornly held back tears with a soon-to-be weeping face. In the haze of the drug’s effect, the calm voice of Ga-eul lingered in her ears.

Ji-hyuk sat up and glanced at his wristwatch. It was past 3 a.m., and he seemed to have dozed off. He didn’t see Go-yeo around. Chuckling at the dropped blanket, he picked it up and placed it back on the sofa.

He climbed the stairs without hesitation. Passing through the second-floor foyer and opening several doors, he searched for Go-yeo. When he opened the innermost room, he sensed that she was there. It was a room filled with her scent, a warm and cozy place.

In the dimly lit bedroom, the corridor light cast long rays of light on the bed. Leaving the door slightly ajar, he approached the bed. Sitting at the head of the bed, he looked down at Go-yeo sleeping peacefully. Her soft snores always made him feel fulfilled no matter how many times he saw her sleeping like this.

She was a dangerous woman, even her disheveled hair looked alluring. 

His. His beautiful Go-yeo.

“…What should I do with you?”

Ji-hyuk took Go-yeo’s white hand in his own. Cute little nails were growing on her delicate fingers. An unconscious smile crept onto his lips as he looked at her, an image ingrained in his mind. After briefly caressing her hand, he lightly kissed her forehead and slipped away.

Ji-hyuk had never once thought that Go-yeo would belong to someone else. Just as it had always been from the beginning, as if it were the natural order of things, as long as he was alive, Go-yeo had to be with Moon Ji-hyuk.