Winter Wolf - Chapter 14. Part 3

Chapter 14. Part 3

“While you were sleeping, I carefully removed all evidence of the incident. I used drugs to mask the smell of blood and clean up any stains. I wrapped the bodies in cloth, along with their belongings, and disposed of them far from the manor to prevent any scent from attracting wolves back to the house.”

“You slept soundly while I tried to take care of your fever, but my hands were stained with blood, so I couldn’t. Instead, I went downstairs to prepare a bath for you.”

“Upon seeing the tub, I realized that you needed to cool down, so I decided to bathe you. I had worked tirelessly to ensure your comfort, and yet you wanted to do your laundry in the kitchen.”

“I wanted you to know that I cared for you and was kind to you while you were alive. I knew that once you were gone, there would be nothing more I could do.”

“However, it appears that you also have something to offer.”

***“Would you like to bathe with me?”***

“Your words, accompanied by your look, convinced me.”

“You had feelings for me. You wanted me, not as the Phantom, the killer, but as Terrence Cardas, the broker.”

“I confessed something intentionally embarrassing, and you didn’t flinch. You didn’t even reciprocate when I kissed you. So, I acted on my desires, fueled by my belief that you wanted me.”

“You love me—the version of you I’ve dreamed of.”

“Lysithea, do you love me?”

“No. “I don’t love you when you make it sound like a business deal.”

“If you truly meant it, it could be wonderful, right?”

“You couldn’t possibly mean it. It would only complicate matters. Being involved with me would only worsen your life. So, I decided not to dwell on it, believing that we didn’t need such feelings between us.”

“During the following week, I was captivated. Every moment spent with you felt intoxicating, like being drunk on affection. I became lost in delusions of a future that would never come to pass.”

“What if I stopped being the Phantom? What if I quit my job as a hitman and began a new life with you, embracing love?”

“My fantasies were never very optimistic. You had a personal grudge against the leader of the Revolutionary Party, and even if I spared your life, he would continue to hire assassins until you were killed.“

“Isn’t it better for me to end your life than for you to live in misery? If that’s the best we can do, then you really shouldn’t dream of love. It’s easier for me to think that way. I can focus on what’s in front of me.”

“You have discovered the detective in question.”

“You were almost killed by intruders just a week ago, yet you are being so careless and kind towards someone who remains a mystery.”

“I couldn’t shoot him because of you. Our positions were reversed, and I thought I had your leash.”

“I couldn’t help but think that I had to draw a line in the sand, that you couldn’t mess with my plans anymore.”

“You came to me and told me that you loved me, that you would drop everything for Terrence Cadas, the man that I play. You would devote yourself to him.”

“I’m sorry, Lysithea, but the man you love does not exist in this world. He is like a ghost. You are possessed by a ghost. Your love will never be reciprocated. I hoped you would never love me.”

“I was trying to be considerate. I knew that eventually I would hurt you, but I didn’t want to break your heart. That’s why I kept pushing you away.”

“You knew the answer, didn’t you? I’m not sure if this feeling is called arrogance or love.”

“You love me.”

Upon hearing those words, I realized that if I didn’t kill you, I would be killed by you.

However, it may have already been too late.

***

Terrence, who had been drugged, obediently answered all of Lysithea’s questions.  Finally, she asked, “So, in the end, you’ve decided to end my life?” Phantom or Terrence slowly nodded in response.

“In my mind, I’ve accepted that I must end your life, and that conviction remains, but it’s not simple,” he admitted.

After finishing his speech, he shook his head and let out a laugh filled with irony and despair. Lysithea tightly closed her eyes, struggling to hold back tears.

“I told you I loved you,” she said, her voice shaking with emotion.

“My confession must have sounded bitter to you. I was the only one who truly meant it, but you didn’t want anything from me,” Lysithea said, her voice choked with emotion as a tear streamed down her cheek.

Phantom noticed the tear tracks on Lysithea’s face and asked, “Can I hug you?” Lysithea, overwhelmed with sorrow, covered her face with her hands and wept uncontrollably. She begged, “Please don’t.”

“Lysithea, when I pointed the empty gun at you,” his voice softened, laced with the weight of confession.

He gently stroked her hair and said, “I intended to shoot you, but the bullet failed to fire. I feared losing myself if I hesitated any longer and felt immense relief.”

Lysithea wiped away her tears. She turned to face him, and he spoke with a smile. “At that moment, I realized that my days as the Phantom were over, that I could never take another life again.”

“Why?” because you couldn’t end mine?”She inquired.

“No. Because I love you,” he confessed.

He took a sharp breath and felt as though his mind had been opened to reveal truths he hadn’t intended to reveal. He confessed, “I don’t have much time left, and I need to make a decision, but I don’t believe I’ll ever be able to bring myself to kill you. I’ll keep delaying it, perhaps forever,” he confessed, his eyes distant, as if he had glimpsed the future. Lysithea couldn’t understand how long he had struggled with this decision. She didn’t want to know.

Lysithea recalled their first meeting. She remembered his smiles, which were sometimes tender and sometimes warm. Perhaps his gestures, words, and expressions were not entirely false, but they were not entirely genuine either.

Lysithea struggled with love, anxiety, and betrayal. She couldn’t tell what was real and what wasn’t, even after a confession.  Her emotions were a whirlwind of memories, including laughter, tears, and fluttering hearts.

Lysithea had conflicting thoughts. She wondered if she could find the clarity that would come from shedding the false memories of him. However, she was unsure which memories to keep and which to throw away. Could they truly love each other as they were?

She closed her eyes and felt a wave of resignation wash over her. After a moment of silence, she declared, “I’m going to forget everything.”

“You were never a part of my life, like a ghost. and you never will be again,” she declared, standing up.

As she was leaving, he hurried after her and said, “Wait, before you go, could you do me a favor? Just one.”

She turned back and looked at him cautiously. He pointed to the table. She feels like he’s losing her mind. “Could you please give me a sip of water?”

After confessing, Terrence Cadas was the first to reach for water.

Lysithea noticed his trembling fingers, a clear indication of the drug’s effect on him. He was now incapable of posing any threat, reduced to basic functions such as breathing and speaking. Overpowering her was out of the question.

Lysithea approached him slowly, despite knowing this. She was aware that this might be the closest she would ever be to him again. As she drew nearer, her heart raced, indicating she still needed more time to fully embrace her feelings for him.

Lysithea did not give him water but reached for her wine glass. He laughed at her choice.

“Seriously, wine?”

“It’s the last one,” she replied solemnly.

Lysithea carefully lifted the glass to his lips and adjusted her posture to make it easier for him to drink. He briefly met her gaze with a blank stare.

She almost lost her balance as he reached for something unseen. His sudden movement caused Lysithea to tighten her grip on the glass.

Their lips collided unexpectedly as she brought the glass to his mouth. The glass shattered, and he forcefully pushed his tongue into her mouth, overpowering her attempts to break free. She tried to pull away, but his grasp was too firm.

Lysithea shook her head and stepped back as the kiss abruptly ended. She felt his grip gradually weaken as he let out a hollow and bitter laugh.

“Well, I guess that didn’t work,” she remarked.

Lysithea took a sharp breath and briefly clutched his chest before pulling away. Her body trembled again. She scolded herself for letting her guard down.

As she walked away, she heard his voice calling out to her.

“Don’t forget me, Lysithea.”

Lysithea clenched her jaw. She refused to look back as she left him behind.

***

Terrence sat still for a long time, lost in the drug’s effects. He confessed while intoxicated and eventually fell asleep undisturbed.

He dreamed of navigating through a thick white fog. His fingers tightly clutched the rough wooden railing. The mist gradually lifted, revealing that he stood on the second floor of a building. From there, he overlooked the open hall below, where Lysithea del Arman stood.

Her presence woke him up, and he muttered her name, “Lysithea.”

Upon waking up, he felt extremely thirsty.