Once Love Begins - Chapter 8. Part 3

Chapter 8. Part 3

Hana appeared unhappy to hear her voice, so something was wrong. When she attempted to comfort Hana by placing her arm around her, Hana coldly pushed it away.

“What’s wrong, Hana?” she asked, noticing the unusual mood in her friend.

Hana’s stare was sharp, almost accusing.

“Why didn’t you tell me Jae-ho confessed to you?”

“It was because he confessed while drunk. That’s all.”

“But you knew I had feelings for Jae-ho. You should have told me.”

She felt ashamed. She realized she should have been honest with Hana from the beginning. Keeping silent about Jae-ho’s confession was her mistake.

She thought, ‘Am I going to be alone again?’She felt her heart sink.

“I’m sorry,” she finally said.

“Don’t contact him for a while. Wait until I reach out to you,” Hana replied sternly.

“Yes,” she nodded weakly.

She stood still until she walked into the lecture hall. Inside, she stopped and saw Hana talking and laughing with friends. One of them looked at her and whispered to Hana, who shook her head.

She tightened her hold on the strap of her bag, her nails digging into the palms of her hands, but she didn’t budge.

“Are you going to just stand there?”

Hye-yoon complained, asking her to move instead of just standing there. Apologizing, she moved to a seat two rows behind Hana.

Hye-yoon sat next to her, staring ahead with a piercing stare.

She avoided talking to Hye-yoon, who frequently criticized her for feeling too entitled.

She searched the room for Shin Jae-ho, but he was nowhere to be seen.

“What’s that ring?” Hye-yoon’s loud query drew attention, and she quickly hid her hand in embarrassment. Others glanced over, curious to see the ring on her fourth finger.

“Is it yours?”

“No.”  

“Oh, really? I thought you didn’t have a boyfriend. How long have you been dating?”

She stayed quiet, uncomfortable under the gaze.

“I just got a ring too. Isn’t it pretty?”

“This is yours,” she said, noticing that Hye-yoon wanted to show off her ring.

“Yeah, it’s pretty.”

She didn’t want to talk to Hye-yoon, but she knew Hye-yoon wouldn’t stop until she got an answer. So she gave in and provided the response Hye-yoon wanted to hear.

Back home, she had an irritating collection of expensive rings, but she didn’t care much for accessories and hardly looked at them.  

Kang-Jae suggested buying a ring. Without his suggestion, she wouldn’t buy and wear something that feels so unfamiliar. She also wouldn’t be the center of attention.

Suddenly, Hye-yoon’s mood changed uncomfortably.

She already missed Hana. They could converse for hours without getting tired.

“My boyfriend opened a restaurant near his school. You should visit sometime,” Hye-yoon suggested.

She hesitated, almost wondering why she would approach Hana. They weren’t particularly close. However, she decided against voicing her thoughts and stayed quiet.

“It looks like your man isn’t rich,” Hye-yoon commented, eyeing her hand, especially the ring. She adjusted her ballpoint pen with a smile on her face.

“It’s a gift,” Yeon-woo said.

“Why?” she added

“Just because,” Hye-yoon responded vaguely.

She knows Hye-yoon’s personality. She tended to stay quiet around those she saw as stronger but was not hesitant to speak up to those she saw as weaker.

She had many questions about her bag, shoes, and clothes, especially wondering how she managed to acquire a bag not available in Korea.

Although the bag was a gift from her mother-in-law, she found herself wearing a ring that cost less than her own possessions for the first time in her life, eager to flaunt it along with her boyfriend’s.

A junior sitting beside her asked about the shop. She felt annoyed and was about to say that it was her boyfriend’s shop, not hers, but then she looked at Hana and refrained from doing so.

Normally, Hana would have intervened, but she remained silent. Even in this situation, Hana avoided looking at her.

Her fingernails were white from holding the ballpoint pen tightly, and her mood continued to plummet until the end of class.

As she stumbled along, lost in her thoughts, someone suddenly approached her and tapped her on the shoulder.

“Hey Joo Chan, why do you look upset? Did something go wrong?”

“Senior Joo Chan.”

She tried to smile when she saw his beaming expression.

“Have you had a meal yet? If not, come on, let’s eat together.”

“Alright,” she agreed reluctantly. She was trying to suppress her hunger because she didn’t want to dine alone.

***

“I thought you were going to study abroad?” she asked.

They entered the pork chop restaurant across from the school and felt a sinking feeling of anxiety.

This was the same place where Jae-ho and Hana had eaten before. The feeling seemed never-ending. Surprisingly, she didn’t feel this uncomfortable even when her old friends were bullying her.

He replied, “Yes, it seems that way.” Her heart sank further.

She inquired, “Are you going?” Confirming the rumor, he nodded and then placed a bowl of food in front of her. Her cheeks turned red as she glanced at the bite-sized pork chop pieces.

*During a dinner at a steak restaurant that her grandfather had booked for them before their wedding, he teasingly raised his eyebrows at her. She recalled the moment. His expression seemed to question, ‘You can’t even handle that?’*

She stood up from her seat, brushing off the feeling. She had only eaten half of her steak, and this realization stirred up emotions within her.

He said, “I was supposed to come here with the girl I was supposed to marry.”

“You are too young to be married,” she said, ‘Even though she got married early, it was for my grandfather’s surgery.’

Joo Chan’s house was close to theirs, showing he was rich. Important people like lawmakers and wealthy folks lived around them.

“So, you have someone special in your life then?”

“I am studying abroad by myself.”

His smile disappeared, replaced by a sadness in his eyes, suggesting that something had gone wrong with the woman he planned to marry.

He appeared to be forcing a smile, which hinted at his loneliness. It was evident that he was pretending.

“Feel free to start eating.”

“Okay.”

She focused on her meal, keeping her head down. However, when she glanced up, she noticed him smiling at her.

“Watermelon will be ready for a walk tomorrow. Would you like to join?”

“Sure, okay.”

She tried to smile genuinely, but all she could manage was a forced one, haunted by memories of his insincere smile.

She wondered if he could see through her appearance. Perhaps he could, she thought.

The following day, which happened to be the weekend, she went for a jog around the area with her faithful dog, Watermelon.

She didn’t exactly walk; she felt like she was being dragged. When she finally returned home, she was soaked in sweat, and not just on her forehead. Spending time with her dog was a welcome distraction, but it couldn’t erase the confusion in her mind.

After taking a refreshing shower, she got into bed. She pushed aside thoughts of his suggestion to change rooms.

She checked her phone for messages from Hana but found none. Frowning, she buried herself under the blankets.

She quickly fell asleep, whether due to the morning run or the sleepless night before.

The door creaked open, and she tensed, expecting him to enter. However, she heard him mutter something under his breath when the door remained closed. His footsteps faded, leaving her alone in the silence of the room.

She curled up and closed her eyes tightly. It felt as though rocks were pressing down on her chest, making it difficult to breathe and difficult to find peace. Everything felt heavy—the burden on her body and the weight on her mind.

* * *

It was a weekend, and she was taking a break, but in the evening, Jaeho contacted her and asked her to meet him at a coffee shop near her house.

As soon as she saw him, she wanted to say something to him, but when she saw the weight loss on his face, she couldn’t be angry.

“You were bad.”

“I’m sorry. Really.” She sighed and glanced at Jae-ho, wondering if she should be resting.

“Did you really have to tell Hana that?”

“I didn’t mean to say that.”

“We were supposed to pretend it didn’t happen.”

She cringed. Her nose was running, and her eyes were burning. She’d relied on Jaeho and Hana so much; she thought they were good friends, and it made her insanely sad that she couldn’t take them back now.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”

“It was really bad. Don’t even contact me. Don’t even pretend to know me if we run into each other. You’re a bastard.”
Jae-ho apologized, but she ignored him and went for a walk. She eventually came across a bar that caught her attention, and she felt the need for a drink to ease her feelings.

She was not a heavy drinker, but today called for it. She quickly consumed two 500cc beers, causing her head to spin. However, she found temporary relief in it.

She felt unstable on her feet and laughed at herself, the mess inside her mirroring the world around her.

She sat outside the house and watched the passersby and cars, not wanting to go back inside. Eventually, as she started to get sober, she decided it was time to go home.

Upon entering, she found Kang-Jae sitting on the couch, engrossed in his phone, until he noticed her. As soon as he noticed her, he made a sudden move that startled her, and she met his eyes with a glare of disapproval.

“You came home early,” she said flatly.

He raised an eyebrow. He asked, “Why so late?” in a sarcastic tone.

“Have you been drinking?” he asked. His expression showed concern, but she was too tired to be worried.

“Just a little,” she admitted wearily.

“You’re not my grandfather, so don’t lecture me. Did you have fun when you were my age?” she added.

He became quiet, and his eyes grew intense.

“Can’t I have a little fun?” she asked.

Ha, Yeon-woo growled softly as she sighed.

He declared, “I’ll join in.”

She wasn’t even angry; surprisingly, she was just bored. While running her hand through her hair, he firmly grabbed her wrist.

“I didn’t have fun,” he stated firmly.

Her eyes widened in shock. He had not played when he was her age; he had lied. He dragged her across the room before she could react.

“Hey, let go of me!” she protested.

“I’ve transferred your rooms,” he stated abruptly.

She wondered if he was upset with her because she locked her room yesterday.

He was already complaining about the time, and it wasn’t even eleven o’clock yet. She had assumed he was drunk, but now she wasn’t so sure.

“I need to use the bathroom,” she lied, attempting to escape.

“It’s over there,” he said, laughing, indicating that she shouldn’t worry.

She called out, “Wait!” and pushed through the slightly open door into the room.

He gestured in her direction and reassured her. As the door closed behind her, she felt his weight pressing down on her, causing tension in her neck.