In Order to Meet You, Beloved - Chapter 107

EPISODE 107

“Welcome.”

Pamela said, closing the book she had been reading as Cordelia entered. Pamela’s radiant, well-rested face was enough to lift anyone’s mood, including Cordelia’s.

Pamela had always been an intriguing woman ever since they first met. She could be completely indifferent to things she had no interest in, but when it came to her passions, she was unwaveringly dedicated. Unlike the typical noble who avoided labor, Pamela loved gardening, and even now, she maintained a small vegetable patch in the garden.

Initially, Cordelia had found it a bit unusual, but thanks to both of their outgoing personalities, they quickly became friends. At first, she thought Pamela, who was set to marry Frederick, would be some unfortunate woman, but it turned out quite the opposite. Who would’ve guessed that the notorious womanizer would end up being so captivated by her?

“How’s Rick doing? Is he still upset?”

Cordelia felt like they needed to bring the matter to a conclusion sooner rather than later.

“I’m not sure, but he did seem a bit tired. He went out to inspect the estate, so he won’t be back until evening.”

Pamela replied.

Cordelia suspected that was just an excuse. Well, he probably needs time to sort out his own thoughts, she mused.

“And… well.”

Pamela hesitated.

“Be honest.”

Cordelia encouraged.

“I heard about that young man.”

Pamela said, not going into detail, but it was easy for Cordelia to imagine how much Frederick had complained.

“Don’t worry, I’ve soothed him enough.”

Pamela reassured her with a confident smile, still carrying that youthful, carefree demeanor despite being well into her forties.

Cordelia raised an eyebrow.

“Really?”

“Yes. I wouldn’t want him to pass out from anger, especially at his age.”

Pamela added with a laugh.

Cordelia gave her a pointed look. Isn’t he younger than her? She thought to herself. Maybe living with someone younger made their situations somewhat similar. Although, unlike Noah, Rick wasn’t cute in the slightest! But perhaps he was different when it came to Pamela.

“So, you seem to like Noah quite a bit?”

Cordelia asked. Pamela’s friendly nature was well-known, but even considering that her attitude toward Noah was particularly warm.

Pamela smiled softly, her eyes glancing briefly to the side.

“It’s not often you come across someone who creates such interesting works.”

Cordelia followed her gaze to a sculpture placed in the corner of the parlor. It was a well-crafted piece, but its most striking feature was the gaping hole where the heart should be.

“He’s got a unique style.”

Cordelia remarked.

“But why did you buy that?”

“Isn’t the meaning behind it fascinating?”

Pamela responded with a twinkle in her eye.

“Fascinating, sure. But isn’t it also blasphemous?”

Cordelia asked, unable to suppress a smirk. After all, Noah had already painted murals on the temple walls, and now this? He wasn’t one to shy away from provoking controversy.

Pamela, however, appeared unfazed.

“It may look grotesque to others, but I think that flaw is what makes it beautiful.”

“Is that so?”

Pamela stood, carefully picked up the sculpture, and brought it back to the table in front of Cordelia. As she set it down, Cordelia studied it more closely. The figure, dressed in a tunic, appeared ordinary except for the gaping hole in its chest.

“We’ve always seen the gods as perfect beings, haven’t we?”

Pamela spoke in a low, conspiratorial tone.

“But the world we live in is far too unfair for it to have been created by a perfect god, don’t you think?”

Cordelia felt a strange sensation as she watched Pamela. Despite her usual cheerful demeanor, Pamela occasionally made remarks as sharp as those of Cordelia’s older sister.

“Maybe this world was created by a being that’s missing something. Perhaps lacking in mercy or possessing a mischievous side.”

Pamela mused softly.

It was a time filled with suffering. Even thinking back to events just a few years prior, Cordelia couldn’t help but be reminded of all the relationships that had been severed forever. For a fleeting moment, a deep sorrow passed over her face.

“But in a way, that makes it all feel more human, doesn’t it? The world is broken, and that’s why there’s so much injustice. When you look at it that way, it’s strangely comforting, don’t you think?”

Cordelia found herself unable to immediately respond to Pamela’s profound musings, and Pamela simply smiled warmly at her hesitation.

“Do you think the person you brought here might share similar thoughts?”

Cordelia, about to answer thoughtfully, suddenly froze, her gaze locking onto the book cover lying on the table. The title, ‘Night of Frey’, was prominently displayed, offering no chance of escape from reality.

“Wait a second… that book?”

“Oh, this? Lady Calia brought it from the capital, and said it’s quite popular and really enjoyable.”

Cordelia had recently hinted to her sisters that she wanted to reveal more about her life soon, but she hadn’t expected groundwork to already be laid. It was both surprising and nerve-wracking.

“Is that so? And you’re enjoying it?”

Cordelia asked, trying to suppress her tension.

Pamela nodded enthusiastically.

“Yes, it’s light reading but with impressive detail about etiquette and noble life. I’d guess the author is a noble. The writing is truly beautiful—I can see why it’s so popular.”

Cordelia’s expression softened slightly at the praise, but she wasn’t prepared for what came next.

“Though, I get the feeling the author doesn’t like men much. Seems to have a rather deep distrust of people in general!”

If she had been drinking tea, Cordelia might have spat it out in shock. She barely managed to keep her composure after the sudden comment.

“W-Why do you think that?”

Pamela thought for a moment before answering.

“It’s hard to explain, but when the male protagonist is described, there’s a certain coldness. And the female lead? She’s drawn to the man in her dreams, but she also feels a strange aversion to him. It’s quite telling.”

Pamela flipped through the pages of the book until she found a passage and pointed to it.

“For example, here, it says: ‘It is easy to shower someone with praise, yet there is no hint of sincerity to be found.’ The way the author portrays society is just so… detached.”

Cordelia was slightly taken aback as she listened to Pamela casually analyze the book. Did she write that? She wondered but focused on what Pamela had to say.

“And yet, what’s lovely is the sense that they can still change.”

Pamela continued.

“Despite how cold and distant the two characters seem at first, they do eventually find happiness together. It’s almost like the author believes people can’t be sincere, but then offers hope that they can.”

As Pamela’s words seemed to peel back layers of emotions Cordelia had been trying to avoid, she felt a wave of conflicting emotions—discomfort mixed with a strange sense of relief. After the storm of feelings settled, she was left with a kind of calm acceptance.

Pamela tilted her head, noticing the shift in Cordelia’s demeanor.

“Cordelia?”

With some difficulty, Cordelia finally spoke.

“Pamela, I think… there’s something I’ll need to tell everyone soon.”

It took effort to get the words out, as she pressed down her emotions, trying to keep her tone as nonchalant as possible.

“When that time comes, don’t be surprised. Just listen. That’s all I need.”

Pamela, in her usual lighthearted manner, smiled brightly.

“Of course.”

* * *

Noah showed up later than expected, not because he had overslept, but because he had been wandering around the area early in the morning. Cordelia led him to the castle library, where the vast collection of books left him quietly awestruck.

“There are so many books here.”

Noah murmured in amazement.

Cordelia smirked.

“It’s nothing compared to the royal library.”

“Well, we’re all in the same boat when it comes to never finishing them all.”

Cordelia raised an eyebrow.

“Why do you think you won’t finish them?”

Noah’s eyes widened as he looked up from the shelves, his curiosity piqued.

“Is there someone who can?”

“My second sister. I’ve probably read only a fraction of what she has.”

Cordelia replied casually.

Noah nodded, seeming to understand, though he couldn’t help but add.

“Still, you seem quite accomplished to me, Cordelia.”

“True, true. Honestly, my sister is just in a league of her own. But I used to be quite the avid reader myself.”

Cordelia didn’t shy away from accepting such praise. Compliments always had a sweetness to them. She gracefully walked toward the corner of the library, pointing to a spot near a window where the sunlight streamed in, away from the rows of bookshelves.

“I used to sit here and read, thinking, ‘I want to create stories like this, ones that are just as enjoyable.'”

Being five years younger than her next oldest sibling, Jerania, Cordelia often found herself without companions her age, so she learned to enjoy her own company. Exploring the library was one of her childhood adventures.

“Right, I didn’t just want to write romance.”

She mused. When she first thought about writing, it was love stories that captivated her the most, but now, as she dusted off these old memories, she saw things differently.

“I just wanted to share my imagination with others. It gets lonely when you’re the only one talking to yourself.”

She said with a light laugh. The thoughts that would come to her naturally—things she loved, stories she wanted to tell—she wanted others to enjoy them too. That’s probably where it all started, she realized.

She felt a bittersweet nostalgia wash over her, recognizing how much time had passed.

With a soft smile, she turned to Noah and asked.

“What about you, Noah? Why did you want to become an artist?”

Noah didn’t respond immediately, and the unusual silence lingered. When he finally spoke, his voice was low and thoughtful.

“I think I was around seven years old. I visited the Great Temple, and there were these murals on the walls.”

His tone was casual, but his words carried a sincerity he hadn’t shared with anyone before.

“To a child, those paintings looked so enormous, and I thought they were beautiful. I’d never been so captivated by something before.”

Noah’s expression became distant as if the emotions he hadn’t recognized until now were surfacing.

“I think that’s when I first thought, ‘I want to create something that makes others feel this way.’”

As time passed and he grew older, he came to realize how difficult a wish that truly was.

“Well, didn’t you accomplish that? You painted those magnificent murals in the very same temple.”

Cordelia pointed out.

“…I suppose I did.”

Noah replied with a faint smile, still sounding a bit disoriented.

Cordelia waved her hand in front of his face teasingly.

“Why the blank expression?”

“It’s just… I had completely forgotten. I haven’t had the luxury of thinking about it in a long time.”

Noah’s gaze grew distant again, lost in thought until a gentle touch on his hand brought him back. He looked to the side, where Cordelia stood smiling softly.

“You know, when I first saw those murals, my heart raced. I quickly added another reason to like you.”

“Really?”

Noah’s wide-eyed expression was so endearing that Cordelia couldn’t help but pat his arm encouragingly.

“So, have a little more confidence. You’re an amazing man, Noah. You’ve already accomplished so much, so what’s with all the self-doubt?”

While she appreciated his thoughtful and serious nature, Cordelia also wished Noah wouldn’t burden himself with too many heavy emotions. She wanted them to be the kind of people who shared their hardships. Conveying that hope gently, she nudged him with her words, and in response, Noah clasped her hand, offering a quiet but sincere promise.

“I’ll try.”

The warm sunlight poured in through the windows, a soft breeze danced through the air, and the faint scent of wood mingled with the serenity of the library. Surrounded by rows of books, the two of them stood together, their shared thoughts lingering in the quiet moment.

As Noah looked at Cordelia, smiling gently, a thought crossed his mind. No matter what conclusion he comes to, he’ll make sure it doesn’t disturb this peaceful life she cherishes.