I May Be A Villainess, But I Won't Live My Life That Way - Chapter 65

Chapter 65

I was Bianca Croft.

I was born with a noble name and lived striving to become a person worthy of that name. I cultivated not only beautiful appearance but also inner qualities faithfully.

I aimed to become a person without any shortcomings, accumulating knowledge and refining manners. And I became so. At least, I believed so.

“Ricardo.”

But not anymore. A flaw had emerged within me.

And it was a very significant one.

“I cannot marry you.”

I uttered the words I had been contemplating since last night in a very composed manner. And as expected, Ricardo was surprised, just as he was last night.

“What? Is this what you want to say?”

“Yes. And furthermore, I want to break the engagement.”

“Bianca!”

No, not just surprised, but almost horrified, Ricardo exclaimed with a voice full of shock, rising from his seat.

“What happened last night? Weren’t you sure about marrying me?”

“That was yesterday.”

I lifted my head to look at him. I tried to gaze at him indifferently, but inevitably, I ended up glaring at him.

“Before you deceived me.”

“I deceived you?”

He suddenly asked me as if questioning what I said.

Instead of answering, I just glared at him.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“What?”

“That I can’t have children.”

“Bianca…”

“I asked you. If there was any bad news. If there was anything wrong. But Ricardo, you said there was nothing, it was nothing.”

“I didn’t deceive you. I simply didn’t tell you.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“You are still a patient. I just wanted you to focus on recovering, not worrying about such things.”

“You knew I would worry. You knew it wasn’t nothing for me. In fact, it’s a big deal. If I marry you… the Winkaiser House can’t get an heir.”

It was indeed an ‘if’. ‘If I marry Ricardo’.

Because there was no way the Winkaiser House would marry someone who couldn’t bear an heir.

I knew how big of a flaw it was to be a lady of a noble house who couldn’t bear an heir.

Because that was exactly how my mother, the epitome of a perfect lady, was.

My beautiful and elegant mother, the Lady of the Croft, couldn’t produce an heir. What she gave birth to was a daughter, beautiful and elegant like her, but ultimately just a daughter who couldn’t become the head of the Croft House.

The one and only daughter.

People couldn’t openly say anything in front of me, but behind my back, they whispered.

There were endless murmurs about the prestigious Croft lineage coming to an end, and the people in line for succession constantly sought out Croft’s favor in hopes of legitimizing their inadequate sons.

To those people, my mother said nothing, but she bitterly smiled at the sight of a boy who seemed too inadequate to inherit the Croft name.

“Such a fool.”

As I frowned at those boys, my mother would gently stroke my head.

“I dislike boys like that.”

“That boy is older than you.”

“Him? He’s shorter than me, and he looks much stupider than me, doesn’t he? And I saw him eating ants in the garden earlier. Disgusting.”

As I frowned and shook my head, my mother’s hand stopped stroking my head.

“I hate it! Am I not good enough as the only child of Mom and Dad?”

“Bianca…”

“I’ll do better. I’ll become the perfect lady. I can do much better than those stupid boys.”

“Yes, even Mom knows. Our Bianca will become a perfect lady.”

My mother smiled at me. It was a smile that was sad, beautiful, and proud at the same time, proud of the daughter she raised, but also saddened by the fact that her pride and joy was just a daughter.

To my young eyes, it was just a dazzlingly beautiful smile.

“Rather than being divorced, I’ll ask for a divorce first.”

I said my opinion firmly while looking at Ricardo.

At least my mother had given birth to me. So my father could declare that Bianca’s child would inherit the Croft name, defeating all other succession relatives.

But now I had become a body that couldn’t do that.

“Who said you would be divorced?”

“No one dared to say such a thing, but it’s obvious that it will happen.”

“Why do you think so?”

Ricardo asked sharply with a piercing gaze and a firm voice.

“I don’t know how many times I’ve said this, but there will be no divorce.”

“It’s possible to divorce if there’s a valid reason. Being infertile as a future duchess is a very valid reason for divorce.”

As I uttered those words, my lips trembled involuntarily. Just like when the medical staff came rushing to the room yesterday, causing a commotion about a wound, the wound on my abdomen also throbbed painfully.

And my heart ached too.

Why? Could this also be part of the plot in the book?

Was this punishment inflicted on me because I resisted their will, because my struggle to survive disgusted them?

I didn’t even know if it was a request to quietly die, as written in the book, so that the story could flow as written.

If it was indeed so, it was a vile plot, a successful one.

It presented me with the most bitter reason to give up on my lifelong dream of becoming a perfect lady.

“No, it’s not valid.”

What dispelled the thoughts about the book that had come to my mind in an instant was Ricardo’s resolute voice.

As if commanding me to look straight at him, he grabbed my chin and lifted it slightly.

Ricardo’s eyes, unwavering, were fixed on me.

“Becoming the Duchess of Croft when you cannot bear a child may indeed be difficult.
Being unable to produce an heir is a fatal flaw.”

“So, for divorce…!”

“But!”

As if to stop me, Ricardo raised his voice.

“There is no flaw in becoming my partner.”

He didn’t falter. Ricardo’s gaze on me was as steady as the roots of a deep-rooted tree.

“I don’t want the title of Duke of Winkaiser. I want you, Bianca.”

“Ricardo…”

“I’ll give the Duchy of Winkiaser to Carlos. The position of Duke is the same. I don’t need anything. If you can’t be the Duchess of Winkiaser, then I don’t need to be the Duke of Winkiaser either.”

“…”

I couldn’t say anything.

I couldn’t say anything to this man who said he didn’t need the position of the Duke of Sprendo either. What could I possibly say to a man who dared to say he could give up everything else he had?

“Perhaps, am I not enough?”

For just a moment, Ricardo’s eyes wavered.

He, who seemed so firm and resolute that he would never waver, was wavering.

“Bianca, if what you want is the position of a duchess, and if I’m not good enough for that, then…”

The Ricardo who firmly stated that he would discard anything without a hint of wavering was now trembling, afraid that he might not be my choice.

“No.”

I quietly shook my head.

There was a time when it was true. What I wanted was indeed the position of the Duchess of Sprendo.

“Not now.”

I shook my head more firmly.

If you were willing to give up that position, then I could give it up too.

Even if your place isn’t up there high, but down here low, even if it’s just standing on the ground with both feet, I wanted to be by your side.

“What I want right now is not the Duke of Winkaiser, but you.”

His wavering black eyes gazed deeply at me.

Yes, Ricardo’s eyes, which I adored, were exactly like this.

Clearly black, so it seemed like they saw nothing, but if you looked closely, they seemed to contain every emotion and every color in those black pupils.

“But don’t you like children?”

I hesitated for a moment, noticing the subtle brightening of his expression when he looked at children, then I spoke at last.

“I do like children.”

Softly wrapping his arms around me, he said, “But not as much as I like you.”

A gentle smile formed on both our lips.

“Bianca, you’re enough for me.”

I eagerly met his approaching lips.

“Ricardo.”

As I whispered his name between our breaths, he pressed his lips gently against mine, as if to answer. He swallowed the sound of his own name, as if it were a secret code that no one else should hear.

“Bianca.”

I did the same. As his soft voice called my name, I gently swallowed it.

I couldn’t tell if the sound that passed between us was the sound of my name, his breath, or my saliva. Perhaps it was all of them.

It was more than just a sweet kiss.

It was our promise, our oath. We continued the solemn act of exchanging vows.

“Smile Love”