I May Be A Villainess, But I Won't Live My Life That Way - Chapter 44

Chapter 44

Facing each other, Ricardo remained silent, and I, in turn, did not press him for any business. Between us, there existed nothing but a suspended silence and the fragrant scent of Darjeeling, floating through the air like dust particles.

The silence was not uncomfortable. Ricardo and I had a longstanding relationship, and being in the same space while spending our time in our own ways was something we were accustomed to.

“…The fruit is sweet.”

Finally breaking the prolonged silence, Ricardo uttered his first words. I quietly glanced at the fruit plate in response.

Knowing Ricardo didn’t fancy sweet things, I had intentionally instructed Fanya to prepare fruits that were not overly sweet. The plate contained blue apples, grapefruits, and tomatoes.

Which of these is considered sweet?

“You don’t seem to be around much at the orphanage these days.”

Perhaps realizing that his question sounded peculiar, Ricardo turned his words slightly.

“I’ve been busy.”

Smiling with an expression that suggested he should know how occupied I was, my response was a lie. The significantly reduced invitations and well-wishing letters had left me with spare time. I simply avoided going outside because I disliked hearing the gossip.

Moreover, visiting the orphanage amidst all this would have been perceived as hypocritical, so I refrained from going.

“I see.”

Whether he believed my lie or pretended to believe it, Ricardo nodded and took a sip from his teacup.

“…”

“…”

After sipping the tea, Ricardo fell silent once again. With a contemplative expression, he gazed at the teacup and then, after a quick glance at me, turned his eyes towards the window.

“Bianca.”

“Yes.”

As if preparing to finally speak his mind, I took a deep breath. I would not be surprised, nor would I waver, even if he were to question or blame me.

Or even bring up the topic of annulment.

“About the rumors…”

“Yes?”

I took a deep breath, as if I were finally going to say something.

I wouldn’t be surprised. And I wouldn’t be shaken.

Even if he accused me of something.

Or if he brings up the breakup.

“…What did you eat for breakfast?”

Suddenly, asking what I had for breakfast… Why did he ask that?

“You mean breakfast?”

“Yes.”

At the abrupt question, I blinked.

Has Ricardo ever asked such a question before?

No.

Is Ricardo a connoisseur of food?

No.

Has he ever worried about whether I eat well or skip meals?

Not at all.

“…I had a little bit of apple and eggs.”

“That’s it?”

“I usually don’t eat much for breakfast.”

“It’s better to have a hearty breakfast. And balanced. At least have a piece of bread and some nuts. It’s better with milk or cheese.”

For a moment, I felt like I was back in my hometown when my nanny, a nagging woman, would say that Bianca misses nothing but perfection, and the only flaw is her tendency to be picky with food.

“Are you telling me this as advice for a balanced breakfast?”

“Well… no.”

Of course not.

Although there’s something to say, looking at him hesitating to speak, I narrowed my eyes.

What is he trying to say by hesitating like that?

Was he really going to tell me about the breakup?

Since he told me not to die, it would be difficult for him to bring up the story himself.

“Do you have something to say?”

After realizing that Ricardo has something to say, the silence between us could no longer be a comfortable moment.

In the end, I broke the silence and directly asked him.

“Oh, was that…?”

Ricardo, who had opened his mouth to say something, closed it again when our eyes met.

Then, he closed his eyes, opened them again, looked at me, and opened his mouth as if he was going to say something.

But instead, he just swallowed the air and closed his mouth again.

And looking at him like that, I felt frustrated.

It might be better to just get it over with quickly. Why does he hesitate like that?

“Ricar…”

“Bianca.”

Unable to endure it any longer, I called his name, and that’s when Ricardo, who was looking out the window, finally looked straight at me.

“Yes, please speak.”

“No, you go first.”

“You go ahead.”

“I’m fine.”

“Okay. Then let me speak first.”

After several struggles, I decided to speak first.

“Ricardo.”

“Sure.”

“If you have something to say, please do it quickly.”

“Was that what you wanted to say?”

“Yes.”

Ricardo furrowed his eyebrows slightly, but I confidently opened my mouth just to urge him.

“Do you have something else to say to me?”

“No, I don’t.”

“…Alright. Then let me speak.”

Even after saying that, Ricardo didn’t speak right away.

Our eyes met, and he opened his mouth once, closed it again, took a shallow breath, and then met my gaze again.

This time, it was for real.

In his serious gaze, there was a determination to finally speak.

And I, in turn, made up my mind to show a determined look under the table, where it wouldn’t be visible, clenching my fist.

“Bianca, I believe in you.”

Ricardo’s eyes didn’t blink for even a moment.

His black pupils called my name, assured me of his trust, and even after finishing all his words, he continued to look at me.

With a gaze that never wavered.

“You believe me?”

“Yes. I know what rumors are circulating right now.”

“But even after hearing those rumors…”

“You wouldn’t do such a thing.”

Confirming it once again, Ricardo cut off the conversation decisively, as if there was nothing more to say.

“How do you know?”

My hand trembled.

From the moment Ricardo spoke words that I hadn’t expected at all, my hand, which had resolved not to waver no matter what he said, was trembling.

“Even though you were indifferent to me.”

“To be precise, ‘were’ indifferent.”

Ricardo corrected my expression like a grammar teacher, emphasizing the past tense.

“In the past… Yes, if it were the old me, I might not have been sure. I could have had someone investigate whether the rumors were true or not. But now it’s different. I know you, Bianca. You’re not someone who would kill another person, and the rumors circulating in the world are just baseless rumors.”

Ricardo concluded with an unwavering voice.

The rumors are just baseless.

“To be honest, I wish you had told me first.”

“What do you mean?”

“Whether it’s true or not. I wanted you to tell me to trust you first.”

“…”

“Yeah. Honestly, it’s my selfishness. I know that someone as prideful as you wouldn’t say such things first. But I wished you had. If you had, I would have believed your words.”

I never knew what Ricardo was thinking. And I thought I would never be able to know in the future.

No matter how much I looked into those deep, inscrutable black eyes, I thought I would never be able to read his inner thoughts.

But now I realized how to know his thoughts.

“But I wanted to tell you that I believe in you, Bianca, and that may not have mattered to you, but it did to me.”

It was just talking.

It was just a matter of asking.

“What are you thinking right now?”

What we lacked was not beauty, money, honor, or power. We had more than enough of that.

It was ‘conversation.’

Now, it wasn’t just my hands that were trembling.

My lower lip was slightly trembling. The legs neatly gathered inside the dress were also the same.

Maybe even my heart, just a little.

“I’m glad you said that.”

Upon Ricardo’s honest words, I couldn’t force a fake smile or tell a lie.

So, sincerely, I responded to Ricardo’s words, expressing my gratitude for what he said and the trust he showed me.

And I smiled.

It was a smile that naturally emerged because I was happy about what Ricardo had said, that he believed me.

The moment I smiled, Ricardo, who was sitting in front of me, seemed momentarily shaken. He looked slightly puzzled.

His slightly open mouth didn’t close this time. It stayed open.

“Ricardo?”

“Ah… Ah…”

When I called his name, wondering if something was wrong, Ricardo finally closed his mouth.

And, like a thirsty person, he stuck out his tongue, licked his lips, and chewed on his lower lip.

Although there was tea in front of him, he acted as if he were parched.

“Just now, that smile.”

My face stiffened at Ricardo’s words.

The smile from earlier wasn’t the smile I had learned from childhood until now.

It wasn’t the smile I had practiced in front of the mirror, pulling up the corners of my mouth, showing my teeth slightly or not at all, trying to look elegant.

I didn’t know how my lips looked or how my eyes were during that smile that had come out unintentionally.

Worried that my face might have looked strange or distorted, I unknowingly tensed up.

“Did I look strange?”

“What? Oh, no! What I meant… What I wanted to say was, it was a compliment. I wanted to say that you looked beautiful.”

It was truly unexpected.

Compliments about being pretty were something I had always heard since I was young. If anything, the days when I didn’t hear such things at gatherings felt more unusual.

So, being called pretty was a common thing for me, and I wouldn’t consider it particularly pleasing.

“Among all I’ve ever seen, you were the most beautiful Bianca.”

Even though Ricardo said that with a smile, I was glad.

The way Ricardo said it and the warmth of his smile were the most beautiful I had ever seen from him.

I couldn’t bring myself to say it so honestly.

“Smile Love”