I May Be A Villainess, But I Won't Live My Life That Way - Chapter 43

Chapter 43

A gruesome stench, like filthy sewage, wafted through the air.

In my room, with its pristine white bed, spotless furniture, and fragrant flowers, an insufferable odor lingered at the tip of my nose.

I knew what it was.

It was the odor of baseless rumors, devoid of sound or form.

The daily accumulation of invitations, once overflowing, gradually diminished.

The laughter of those who always greeted me with a smiling face seemed a bit forced.

And the murmurs, rumors, and more rumors.

‘Bianca? The rumor of her poisoning is too frightening.’

‘How can that be? What could she lack?’

‘That’s what makes it even more terrifying.’

‘Shh! It’s not even confirmed yet.’

‘True. Even if it were Croft, one should be cautious.’

‘To commit such a wicked act! Eventually, she’ll face divine retribution.’

When I turned my head, no one was looking at me, and no one was mocking me.

But I felt the unpleasant gazes and heard incomprehensible murmurs.

‘If she doesn’t like it, she won’t hesitate to resort to poisoning; a villainess hiding a malicious nature behind a kind mask.’

That was the image of me in the rumors.

The reputation I had built up over the past few years was now plummeting into a mud puddle.

“It’s just a momentary thing.”

Rumors were like passing winds.

In society, scandals like this were common.

The runaway of the Viscount de Trian’s heir with his stepmother, which once caused a stir, was now forgotten over time.

The Marchioness of Bedelli giving birth to a baby with dark skin was also no longer remembered by people.

Moreover, baseless rumors about me, with no evidence and a non-existent disappearance, would soon fade away.

“It will get better.”

But I couldn’t understand why my hands keep trembling.

I didn’t know why I kept looking back anxiously, why I felt a cold and black hand stroking my neck, and why the chilly water droplets felt like they were wrapping around my ankles, making me involuntarily glance around.

If someone were to ask me now, I would undoubtedly describe the angel of death as a woman with long hair and cold hands.

“Miss, the weather is lovely today.”

In Panya’s smiling face, as she opened the door and entered, there were only three letters. One of them was a promotional letter from a dress shop announcing new season products.

The numerous invitations to balls and receptions, asking me to grace them with my presence and brighten the events, hid away like endangered animals, leaving no trace.

“The flowers in the garden have bloomed beautifully. How about going for a walk outside?”

Handing me the letter with a cheerful tone, Panya suggested, opening the letter envelope.

Her tone was unusually high and overly bright compared to her usual voice.

“Or maybe visiting Lara?”

“Why are you suggesting that? What’s the meaning behind it?”

“What?”

“Why do you keep urging me to go outside, asking where to go?”

“Well…”

Panya couldn’t find an answer and hesitated.

Bowing her head, she peeked at me with a sly look, blatantly trying to gauge my reaction.

“Are you still afraid of me?”

“Oh, no.”

Panya’s denial came almost instantly, as if she didn’t need much time to think.

Feeling somewhat emotional at the thought that even a servant was now looking down on me, I teared up slightly.

It took three years for wealth to decline, a year for power to wane, but the fall of reputation happened in the blink of an eye.

“You…”

“I now know that Lady Bianca is a kind person. So, I’m not scared anymore.”

As I was about to respond, Panya quickly added, with words I never expected.

“Yes, you used to be scary. Shouting, throwing things, and the terrifying glare were really frightening.”

Hesitatingly, Panya once again looked at me.

I couldn’t tell if she was still scared of me or not.

“But now?”

So, I urged Panya to continue speaking.

“But now, having experienced being around you, I’ve come to realize what a kind person you are. Helping orphans, assisting retired soldiers, delivering relief supplies to refugee camps.”

Panya listed the charitable activities I had undertaken in the past.

My forehead, which had furrowed at her words, was gradually relaxing.

“And you’ve been good to me too. Raised my salary, even gave me a cake as a gift before. My siblings really enjoyed it! They finished it all in five minutes.”

“So, you’re not scared of me anymore because I give you money, gifts, and such?”

“Well, that too, but…”

As if debating whether to cross a line drawn on the floor, Panya made a contemplative expression.

Then, she looked up at me, swallowed her saliva, and spoke.

“Lady, you shout if I’m not quick enough, glare at me if I make a mistake… it’s almost like you’re going to eat me alive.”

Didn’t she just say I wasn’t scary a moment ago?

“But, but, if I do well, you don’t do that. So, what I want to say is, if I’m not like a snail, you’re not scary, and you’re not just kind but very kind… I mean, ordinary ladies are kind, and not kind ladies are…”

Panya rambled on.

Her words made little sense, but fortunately, I understood.

“So, your point is?”

As I spoke, Fanya, who had been sweating profusely while saying something, closed her mouth.

In her expression, as she swallowed her saliva again, relief seemed evident.

“If you haven’t done anything wrong, I’m a kind person; if you’ve done something wrong, I’m a scary person. Is that right?”

“Yes, yes! Yes! That’s right!”

Panya vigorously nodded in agreement with my words.

“And also, before I personally met you, I used to see you occasionally, heard rumors, and was scared of you too. So, those people saying bad things about you probably don’t know you well.”

There was no longer any hesitation or searching for cues in Panya’s tone.

As if determined to convey this message, only firm eye contact and a definite tone remained.

“So, don’t pay attention to rumors. You are a good person.”

Clutching her fist, Panya told me.

As if her words were certain.

“Yeah. Thank you.”

As I thanked Panya with a slight smile for her encouragement, her face turned red for a moment, and an embarrassed smile brightened her expression.

“As you said, the weather is nice.”

Beyond the window, there were red flowers as vibrant as Panya’s red face, and the sunshine was as bright as her cheerful smile.

“Get ready for a walk.”

The sun was warm.

Despite always passing by the garden, walking right beside it felt like a different experience.

Although the flowers in the garden were the same as those in the vase in my room, the ones in the garden seemed to carry a different fragrance.

With the sunlight embracing them a bit more, they seemed to capture the scent of the breeze more generously. Walking through the garden, I felt a refreshing sensation.

“It’s almost tea time, my lady.”

Walking together, Panya informed me.

Before she spoke, I was unaware that the time had come.

“Then, let’s go back.”

Since I had already changed my mood, I turned my steps without any lingering reluctance.

“What tea should we prepare?”

“Peppermint.”

Maybe because I saw a lot of green, I thought of herbal tea.

“Oh? It seems someone has arrived.”

By the time we reached the mansion, a carriage that seemed to have just arrived came into view.

Panya seemed not to have noticed where the carriage came from, but I recognized it.

The crest engraved on the back of the carriage was very familiar to me.

It was the insignia of the Winkaiser family, which I had seen for ten years.

“Panya.”

“Yes, my lady.”

“We need to prepare two cups of tea.”

Looking at the man getting off the carriage, I spoke to Panya.

“Cancel the peppermint. He doesn’t like peppermint flavor.”

“Oh, then what should we prepare?”

“Black tea. Darjeeling, strong. No sugar, but have cream ready. For the refreshments, prepare fruits, not cookies, and make sure they’re not too sweet.”

I recited his preferences to Panya, not having specifically memorized them but unintentionally remembering them from always observing and seeing him.

Even as I spoke, my gaze remained fixed on him as if it were magnetically drawn to him.

The tousled hair fluttering in the wind and the solid shoulders with no hint of shaking formed a pleasing contrast.

“Panya, go ahead and prepare for the reception in the drawing-room.”

“Yes, my lady.”

Nodding, Panya quickly walked towards the mansion. I, on the other hand, strolled towards the carriage at a leisurely pace.

Thinking about what he might have come to say.

As the future Marchioness, would he admonish me for being involved in such rumors?

Or perhaps, did he come to inquire whether it was true?

If not, did he come to blame me for such an act?

Maybe, just maybe, he might suggest that now there are valid reasons for calling off the engagement.

“It’s been a while, Ricardo.”

My thoughts were only in my head, countless distractions that existed solely within my mind.

Approaching him, I greeted him with my usual tone, accompanied by an elegant smile on my face.

“Bianca.”

Ricardo’s face hardened slightly.

“Please go inside. I’ll have tea ready.”

Before he could say anything, I turned away.

And I made up my mind.

No matter what he said, I would keep my graceful smile and determined demeanor.

“Smile Love”