I May Be A Villainess, But I Won't Live My Life That Way - Chapter 38

Chapter 38

“Ah! Today, I found out that Lord Ricardo is also here. He’s teaching swordsmanship to the boys here.”

As if she noticed that I was looking at Ricardo, Maria turned around, glanced at Ricardo once, and then kindly informed me.

I already knew this fact.

“So, after the class, the kids who finished practicing were playing together, and Ricardo is with them too.”

“I see.”

“Bianca, would you like to join us? Playing with the kids after a long time is very enjoyable.”

Maria reached out her hand willingly.

“Wow! Let’s play together, Princess!”

Lara tugged at my skirt, full of excitement.

Play together? Right here?

Even though Lara was pulling on my skirt, my feet wouldn’t move willingly.

Was she telling me to sit on the ground? In the new dress I just bought?

Moreover, playing together likely meant doing that mysterious flapping thing together. Jump around right now?

“Oh, no. I…,” it was impossible.

It was easier to win the equestrian competition or participate in a violin concerto than to be told to jump around without dignity.

Participating in an official competition might not have happened, but my skills were more than enough.

However, sitting on the dirty ground or jumping around without dignity was impossible.

I couldn’t show someone my sweaty appearance.

It was truly impossible.

“Hiing~ Won’t you play with me, Princess?”

Lara, looking disappointed, looked up at me with a discouraged face.

“Children would like it if Lady Bianca joined.”

“Oh no, I must have a cup of tea with the director.”

Maria tried to persuade me again, disappointed, but I shook my head.

“Oh! The director is not here right now. She went out to meet someone who is designing a building.”

“Is that so? Then, I’ll give the children some gifts and be off.”

“Gifts?”

As if the word ‘gifts’ caught her attention, Lara’s eyes twinkled.

“Yes. Can you write Bianca Croft now?”

At my words, Lara blinked her eyes. Then, she suddenly avoids eye contact.

Not yet, apparently.

“Can’t write at all?”

“I can write B, Bianca, but I still can’t write Croft.”

It was hard for me to understand that even after all this time, Lara still couldn’t properly read or write with Croft.

I clearly memorized all the alphabets on the first day I started studying with the governess. The next day, I wrote not only my name but also the names of my family members and the names of my deceased grandparents.

But regardless of that, Lara, who had drooping shoulders, looked so adorable.

“Well, I brought you a gift to encourage you to study hard.”

I had originally brought her a gift thinking she could write Bianca Croft, but I disguised it as a pep talk.

When she becomes proficient in Croft, I can give her another gift.

“Wow! What’s the gift?”

“You have to wash your hands first before you can receive it.”

“Ah! Is it something delicious?”

The moment I mentioned washing hands, the clever child immediately burst into laughter, deducing that it was something to eat.

Indeed, Lara seemed incredibly smart. Wasn’t she a genius?

Although she might still lack a bit in reading and writing, she seemed exceptionally clever.

“Well, first, wash your hands and then come get the delicious thing I gave you.”

“Yeah!”

In response to Maria’s words, Lara replied loudly.

“I’ll take the kids to wash their hands.”

In response to Maria’s words, I nodded lightly. Then, an unexpected situation remained when Maria took all the kids away.

The front yard, which was lively until a moment ago, became quiet, leaving only Ricardo and me.

“…”

“…”

We just looked at each other without saying a word for a moment.

It was awkward.

I realized it wasn’t because we hadn’t seen each other often or hadn’t had many conversations. We weren’t that close to begin with.

It was our first meeting after that embarrassing conversation last time. And it was an unexpected encounter that I hadn’t mentally prepared for in a place I didn’t expect.

“Panya.”

I couldn’t help myself and turned around. Panya, who was standing in front of a wagon filled with cupcakes and cookies, urgently approached my call.

“Yes, miss.”

“Carry the cakes inside. The children can eat them after they wash their hands.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

I nodded and watched Panya walk back to the wagon. I wasn’t supposed to be watching, but I was.

Because if I turned my head again now, Ricardo would be standing there.

And it would be awkward again.

“Bianca.”

I prayed for Maria or Lara or one of the other kids to come out, but it was a low voice that found me first.

I briefly considered pretending I didn’t hear them, but then realized that would be cowardly.

“Yes.”

I turned slowly, and there he was, Ricardo.

He was dressed casually, as he always was when he came here. His white shirt had the sleeves rolled up, and a few buttons were undone rather than tightly cinched around his neck.

“It’s been a while, I see.”

“It has.”

“…….”

“The kids aren’t coming out fast enough.”

“Oh, the taps here aren’t that big. They’re probably waiting in line to wash their hands.”

“I see.”

“…….”

And again there was silence.

Ricardo’s gaze dropped down to me, blinking once.

“You seem to be uncomfortable with me, so I’ll go first.”

That was all that came out of Ricardo’s mouth as he stared at the floor.

“No, no. I’m not uncomfortable.”

Laughing lightly, I tried to brush off his comment.

I was uncomfortable, but I didn’t want to show it because of you.

“Because I’m uncomfortable.”

But unlike me, Ricardo said very lightly that he was uncomfortable with me.

The moment I heard that, I frowned.

I was trying to be as uncomfortable as possible out of respect for him, and it bothered me that he wasn’t willing to put up with it for me.

Of course, I knew this was selfish. Being considerate and kind is something you do because you want to, not because you have to.

But by the same token, isn’t it also natural to feel annoyed with the other person?

“Are you saying you’re uncomfortable being with me?”

“Yeah.”

“Is that because of what happened last time? Because of what I said?”

“Yes.”

“Well, if you’re that uncomfortable, maybe you shouldn’t make it a point to be with me in the future.”

Ricardo frowned, this time at my words.

“Is this about the break up we talked about before?”

“Oh, my, you have quite the memory.”

“Don’t be sarcastic.”

“I was giving you a compliment for having an excellent memory. I don’t understand why you think I’m being sarcastic.”

“Then, according to my excellent memory, did I reject that?”

Now, Ricardo didn’t just furrow his brow but stared at me intensely.

Of course, I got even angrier looking at him.

Being with him is uncomfortable and unpleasant, but he can’t even grant a break up?

Ricardo was truly unpredictable.

Moreover, what was that scene earlier about? He was having a great time with Maria.

For a moment, it felt like a scene from a previous version of the book unfolded before my eyes.

The embodiment of Ricardo, deeply in love with Maria and risking his life, appeared before me.

Yeah, he had an affair while being with me, and just because I said something he didn’t like, he made such an expression?

“Why are you suddenly glaring at me?”

I was flabbergasted. He glared at me first!

“Well, whether you glare at me or not doesn’t matter. We’re not breaking up.”

“Why not?”

“Why? Do you have another man to break off the engagement with me?”

“If there is, will you grant it?”

“What?”

From Ricardo’s somewhat calm face, flames of anger erupted again.

“Now there’s another man…”

With a twisted face, Ricardo took a step closer to me.

“Don’t fight!”

A childish voice resounded loudly in the distance.

Surprised by the loud noise, both Ricardo and I turned to look.

“La, Lara?”

“Don’t fighttttt!”

As if out of breath, the child ran towards us and shouted again.

“Brother Ricardo! Princess!”

Lara, who had quickly approached, alternately stared at me and Ricardo with a stern expression.

Trying to recall her face from before, it seemed like the expression she had in the past.

“Let’s get along and not fight, okay? Right?”

With a small and chubby hand on her hip, she made a scary face but in reality had an unbelievably cute expression.

It was Lara’s ‘you fool’ expression.

“We didn’t fight.”

“Yeah. We didn’t fight.”

It was almost just before that, but anyway, we made that excuse.

“Lies.”

However, Lara wasn’t buying it.

“Come on, make up quickly. Handshake, handshake!”

Looking at me and Ricardo alternately, Lara commanded us.

Perhaps in the orphanage, when kids fought, they were made to shake hands.

But Ricardo and I weren’t kids here; we were adults.

Even with Lara’s command, we didn’t readily extend our hands, just gazing at each other with stern faces.

“Ugh! See, you did fight!”

Watching us like this, Lara shook her head with a sigh as if she couldn’t stand it.

“Come on, shake hands quickly! Make up!”

As if she couldn’t bear it anymore, Lara’s small hand grabbed mine.

I could have easily pulled away, but there was some kind of magic in this small hand, and I couldn’t bring myself to do it. It seemed the same for Ricardo.

“Come on, handshake!”

“….”

“….”

In the end, our two hands touched each other, awkwardly intertwining as if not sure whether to clasp or not.

His hand was large and slightly warm.

Unlike my delicate and smooth hand, Ricardo’s hand felt rough with calloused palms.

“Okay, next is a hug!”

“What?”

“Lara?”

Startled by the next command, Ricardo and I looked at the little mediator.

“After the handshake, you have to hug and pat each other on the back like this!”

“Lara, that’s a bit…!”

I tried to calmly persuade Lara.

And I wanted to make her understand that reconciliation wasn’t just about physical gestures.

But it didn’t work.

“Come on, be good. That’s right. Make up quickly~.”

Lara’s voice, as if she was proud of herself, wasn’t easy to ignore.

Suddenly, Ricardo pulled me into a tight hug.

“Smile Love”