I May Be A Villainess, But I Won't Live My Life That Way - Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The dinner proceeded like any ordinary evening meal, and I found myself engrossed in the elderly guests’ tales of the past. Though I had spent three hours preparing for this gathering, it felt almost too trivial to invest so much effort.

Nevertheless, I nodded along, empathizing with their stories, offering elegant smiles as if to convey my understanding, and occasionally giving nods of agreement, all while pretending to be fully engaged.

The elderly guests at this tedious affair were all individuals holding positions within the empire, and it was my duty as a future duchess to be on good terms with them.

“As expected, the stories of Lord Wensbury are always fascinating.”

It was only natural that his stories were captivating; the number of enemies he faced in each tale seemed to increase each time he recounted his adventures.

“Oh-ho-ho! Is that so? Hearing such praise from a beautiful lady makes me feel quite grand, you know?”

When I prompted him to sit beside me, Lord Wensbury responded with a cheerful grin while sipping on his red wine. I, too, maintained a smile and nodded in agreement.

“Now, the most famous swordsman in the empire and the empire’s most beautiful lady, what a splendid couple you make.”

Lord Wensbury gestured towards Ricardo, who was quietly sitting beside me, sipping his red wine.

“You flatter us.”

“Haha! To have such a humble response! Your humility and reserved nature remind me of my youth. Hahaha!”

For a moment, my perfect smile nearly wavered due to his remark, but I managed to hold onto my composure, responding with an elegant smile and a nod.

“The Empire’s greatest swordsman and the Empire’s greatest beauty. The best couple I have ever seen in my life.”

Lord Wensbury’s words received unanimous agreement from those around, and I, too, joined in the laughter. Of course, I believed in the sentiment, but I merely responded with humility.

“Oh, you two, even though you’re only engaged, your answers are identical! Truly a match made in heaven!”

“Oh, did I say that?”

Everyone burst into laughter at his words, and I, too, followed suit. I intended to respond in such a manner.

“Well, when will you two formally hold the wedding ceremony?”

In truth, I was curious about this question as well.

Initially, I thought it would happen after my debutante ball. Then I considered Ricardo’s return from the war. Later, I believed it might be after I turned twenty. However, three months had passed since my twentieth birthday, and there was still no news of a formal ceremony at the Winkaiser March.

Anxious, Mother considered submitting a petition to the Winkaiser estate, while Father, concerned with his reputation, suggested remaining patient.

And I sided with Father.

Ricardo’s match was undoubtedly me. I had grown up with that belief since childhood, and our engagement, arranged from an early age, involved not only a pact between families but also my intentions.

To be a good duchess, to be Ricardo’s beautiful wife—this had been my long-standing aspiration, the natural course of my life, and my future.

“Perhaps someday.”

In response to Ricardo’s dry answer, this time, even I couldn’t maintain a smile. The corners of my lips, once lifted, involuntarily drooped, and my gaze, which had been fixed on Lord Wensbury, shifted towards Ricardo.

He remained expressionless as if discussing someone else’s story. He didn’t look at me or anyone else.

He lowered the wine glass he had been holding as if listening to a stranger’s story from somewhere near the edge of the table.

“It’s a family promise, shouldn’t it be honored?”

At his words, a passage from the book suddenly flashed through my mind.

No way…

Unconsciously, I bit my lip.

“Yes. Promises and trust are virtues more important to a knight than anything else.”

As if trying to dispel the awkwardness in the air, Lord Wensbury remarked, and a few nodded in agreement.

As an affirmation of mutual control and proof of trust between noble families, marriage without necessarily being based on love was not uncommon in aristocratic circles.

So, Ricardo’s words were not entirely incorrect.

But… I…

“Now, let’s make a toast to this beautiful couple. Fill your glasses, everyone.”

At Lord Wensbury’s words, I smiled and raised my glass.

I smiled brighter than a flower, but a thorny unease was growing inside me.

“May I speak with you for a moment?”

After dinner, I turned to Ricardo.

His seat was always opposite mine. Not side by side like lovers, but across from me at a certain distance. Or opposite.

“Go ahead.”

Maybe it was my judgmental stomach, but Ricardo’s demeanor now was one of ‘if you’re going to talk, I’m going to listen.’

“What you said at the dinner earlier.”

“…….”

“About our wedding.”

“…….”

Ricardo’s face remained expressionless as he spoke.

Suddenly, I wondered if I had misjudged him all this time.

I had always thought of him as a blunt man, a man of few words.

A man who spends more time with his sword than he does with people, a man who is not good at socializing.

To be honest, I thought he was cool in that way. I thought a reticent man like Ricardo was much cooler than a man who talks a lot and doesn’t have anything to say.

I also thought that since he was this kind of man, it was my duty to build interpersonal relationships, expand my network, and make connections on his behalf as the next Duke.

But seeing him now, I realize that this may not be the case.

However, observing him now, I started to question if that was the case. He might not be quiet due to a lack of social skills or interest but because he genuinely had nothing to say.

I wondered if the same could be said about me.

“It might be more convenient for everyone if we get things prepared in advance,”

I spoke calmly as if I were setting a set order.

The reason I didn’t ask when the wedding would take place was due to my pride. Not questioning whether our engagement was merely a pact between families was also a matter of pride.

“Do you think so?”

That was it.

Ricardo turned his head away again, gazing absently out of the window, seemingly disinterested.

At that moment, my fist clenched tightly. It felt like my pride, which I had held onto with all my might, was shattering.

“Will you do it?”

In the end, anxiety triumphed over pride.

“I will.”

Although it was a statement about getting married, his answer made me feel a slight crack in the remaining pieces of my pride.

“Are you saying that…….”

I paused. A passage from a book flashed through my mind, similar to the one that had come to me at the dinner table a while ago.

Bianca shouted at Ricardo, her hand trembling as she held the fan.

“You said you would marry me!”

“It was about the promise between our families. It meant I would do it.”

“Isn’t it the same now? The pact between Winkaiser and Croft is still valid, and you are still my fiancé.”

“No. It’s not the same anymore. We are going to break off the engagement.”

While Bianca was shocked, Ricardo looked at her calmly. Her expression, contorted with astonishment, would no longer be considered imperial beauty.

Thinking about our engagement merely as an alliance between families was exactly what Ricardo was doing now. The situation in the book, with lines spoken by a character resembling Bianca, mirrored the present.

The fictional Bianca had asked if Ricardo would marry her, and the fictional Riccardo had said it would happen.

“Ricardo.”

I called his name quietly.

“…”

“…”

“Speak.”

After calling him and receiving no response, he finally spoke without looking at me, as if he would comply.

As if the darkness outside, where nothing could be seen, was more interesting than my face, the most beautiful in the empire.

Now, things that had never caught my eye seemed to come into view.

“The dog you had when you were a kid.”

“How do you know that?”

Because I read it in a book.

The way Maria looked at him, with her eyes of infinite trust, reminded Ricardo of the dog he’d had as a child. The innocent and clear eyes resembled that child.

Infinitely lovely, infinitely trusting, and infinitely following.

Though it might be disrespectful to compare a woman to a dog, there was no help for it.

The first one to give him trust and love, the first one to give him companionship after he was born, was none other than that dog.

“I heard.”

Ignoring his skeptical gaze, I spoke as if it were no big deal.

“From whom?”

“Does that matter?”

“….”

“If we live together, I thought it would be okay to raise the same kind of dog.”

“Forget it.”

Riccardo rejected it outright, just like in the book.

“Such a pity.”

***

Upon hearing Riccardo’s confession about the death of his most affectionate friend from his childhood, Maria, who loved animals, spoke with tears welling up.

As a kind-hearted and animal-loving person, the death of a puppy was heartbreaking.

“Well, if we end up living together, let’s raise the same dog.”

As if consoling his past wounds, Maria pulled Ricardo’s face toward her and hugged him.

Feeling Maria’s comforting heartbeat, Ricardo, unknowingly, smiled, soothed by the rhythmic pulsing.

“No, we won’t raise the same dog.”

“Why? You liked that dog.”

I asked, feeling my fingertips turning cold.

“Because no other dog can replace that one. It’s unfortunate to be someone’s replacement.”

Ricardo answered.

“Smile Love”