Even if the Dawn Abandons You - Chapter 21

Leonard was miserable. He experienced misery for the first time in his life. Instead of keeping his unexpressed feelings inside, he felt miserable that the other person seemed to exist beyond a certain boundary. Even though six years had passed since their first encounter, Anais always distanced herself whenever he tried to get close, as if there was an insurmountable gap between them. Leonard was tormented by the incomprehensible reasons that kept them apart.

But even his agony couldn’t compare to the uneasiness Anais had felt during the last few days of her imprisonment in the dungeon. The fear that someone dear to her might die suddenly and unjustly had hit her with great force for the first time. However, it was said that countless people outside the imperial palace experienced this kind of fear every day.

After meeting with his father and providing false testimony to protect Frederick, Leonard locked himself in his room and agonized over the future. He worried about the state of the country and Lean.

In truth, this concern had troubled him for a long time. Can this country truly survive as it is? The emperor couldn’t be considered a proper ruler, even in name only. And look at what Henry is doing. Leading the suppression of the revolutionary army, he sometimes seemed like a madman who took pleasure in killing.

Leonard reminisced about a morning many years ago when he passed through Orden, handing out pieces of bread to hungry children. He remembered how he had once advised a starving beggar girl to steal bread and gave her a silver coin. He remembered saving a commoner boy from being beaten by an aristocrat. He remembered the fulfillment he felt in those moments.

While assisting Frederic in finding shelter for the students, Leonard witnessed students of his own age running away to school, just as he had expected. He saw the wounded crying out in pain and witnessed others die before their time, as they stood up against the tyranny and injustice of the imperial family.

It shouldn’t be like this.

I can’t let it continue like this.

During the last few days of Anais’ custody, Leonard made a significant and irrevocable decision. It was a decision that would change his life forever.

Though she initially flinched when he buried his face in her shoulder, she soon stopped moving altogether.

Then, he knelt down in front of Anais, carefully taking her delicate white hand in his, causing his heart to race. This was a posture one would take when making a solemn vow.

“Hey, Your Highness! What if someone sees you? Snap out of it.”

Anais’ panicked voice, trying to dissuade him, echoed in his ears, but he paid no heed and slowly opened his mouth, speaking with unwavering determination. As if declaring his purpose in life, his eyes shimmering with unwavering resolve, he addressed Anais Belmartier, standing before him with the sunlight at her back.

“I swear on my honor, Anais Belmartier.”

Ever since I met you, my life has been a series of experiences I never imagined or felt before. This choice I’m making now is unlike anything I’ve ever done, and yet, it has become a goal I must risk my life to achieve.

“I will become the emperor, no matter what.”

“Yes…?”

“I won’t let my brother inherit the throne. I won’t allow the current emperor to continue ruling.”

It was something he had never contemplated before, so it would take time to prepare. However, once the preparations were complete, Leonard Antoine de Charleroi resolved to make it happen as soon as possible, even if it required drastic measures. He vowed to become emperor and transform the country. With that determination, he knelt before the girl he desired to present a future free of scars, more than anyone else.

“I swear on my honor as the Prince of the Leans Empire, a direct descendant of the founder Antoine I, and the Duke of Pyrenees-Roger. As the emperor of this country, I will ensure that you never have to endure something like this again.”

Slowly raising his head, Leonard met Anais’ gaze. Her clear, calm eyes shimmered like a tranquil lake disturbed by a stone’s ripple. Firmly grasping Anais’ hand, he continued, his voice resolute.

“So, stop crying and wait.”

This time, he didn’t offer Anais a handkerchief. It was an intangible symbol of his promise—a promise to create a world where she could cry in peace without anyone reproaching her, a world where tears were unnecessary.

And since that conversation, Anais hadn’t shed a tear.

Yet, she didn’t have to wait any longer.

? ? ?

Avenir, a bar in the 2nd district of the Seine, was secretly renowned as a regular meeting place for young revolutionaries. Its president, a quiet yet fervent republican, allowed this by turning a blind eye. After the failed uprising in April, the bar fell into disrepair, making it almost impossible to operate. Its state served as a silent reminder: “If you are safe, please return.”

Anais gazed at a single white flower in front of the shop’s entrance, then slowly pushed open the door and entered.

“Anais! Oh my God, Anais!”

Enjolras Remicourt’s shout reverberated through the hushed establishment. Ariane, who had been reading a book on the couch, peered up at the sound. Julien, who had been stretching after imbibing his drink, roused from his slumber. Charlotte and Edmond, assisting the president in cleaning the bar, emerged from the main hall. Enjolras and Auguste approached Anais, scanning her with concerned expressions.

“Are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere?”

“Yes, I’m fine. It’s good to see both Mr. Remicourt and Mr. Germain looking healthy.”

Anais assured Auguste of her well-being, surveying the almost empty main hall of the bar. She had visited this place once or twice a few years ago, under Enjolras’ peculiar logic that she should learn to drink at an early age. Standing still, she reminisced about Avenir back then.

“I thought it would be just as quiet here.”

“…Anais?”

During her days in custody, Anais had plenty of time to ponder. Her tears over her deceased father had been shed that night, and with Frederick’s charges unverified and the second prince protecting her, she didn’t suffer any torment. She used the time to reflect on herself.

“Take a seat at least.”

While assisting Frederic in finding shelter for the students, witnessing those her age fleeing to school, as if there were no other refuge, and witnessing the injured cry out in pain and perish before their time while bravely opposing the tyranny and injustice of the imperial family—Anais had an epiphany.

Anais Belmartier aspired to become a doctor. Come fall, she would enroll in the Medical School of the University of Beaurene. She wanted to live a fulfilling life, dedicated to helping, healing, and saving the wounded, sick, and ailing.

It would be a life of purpose and duty.

But what other purposes and duties existed in this world?

“Don’t say it as if it were natural for me to abandon you…”

Resting her body against the mop held by Edmond Lambert, Anais recalled Leonard’s earlier words, unaware that he was watching her intently. When she was imprisoned, she had considered the possibility that Leonard might abandon her. She had resolved not to resent him for it. After all, he was a high-ranking prince, and she was nothing more than a bourgeois girl. It was natural for someone of his status to disregard and discard someone of her standing.

But how long should such a world persist?

Anais appreciated Leonard’s plea for her not to think it was natural for him to abandon her. However, she desired to live in a world where people like him didn’t have to abandon those less fortunate than them—where abandonment was not the norm. She dreamed of a world slightly or perhaps significantly different from the one he envisioned. Nevertheless, even if he had to forsake her to create the world she desired, even if she had to accept a life where abandonment was expected, she reluctantly yearned for it. And so, after contemplating for several days, she arrived at this decision.

“I swear on my honor as the Prince of the Léans Empire, a direct descendant of the founder Antoine I, and the Duke of Pyrenees-Roger.”

“I will ensure that you never have to endure something like this again.”

Thus, Anais also made her oath. She wagered the value of the days her deceased family members longed to experience, the honor lost by this country and land a millennium ago, and the crimson blossoms of this refreshing spring, stained with the blood of the innocent.

“Please allow me to join the Revolutionary Army. That’s why I’m here.”

Her choice that day was by no means to diminish his honor, even if she could never convey it to him.