Duke, Please Fail! - Side Story 2 (Part 10)

Side Story 2: Part 10

While the moon was full, you told me of the place you must return to. 

The absurd things you did to avenge yourself, the things you accomplished, the things you protected, your people, and even the things between us.

 Yes, you should go back. At least there, I guarded you. I didn’t let revenge consume me.

I found solace in that fact.

Eventually, it became the night of the full moon.

“Leonel, will you see me off?”

How could I refuse? I took out the sleeping pills I had prepared. 

You took my hand, heading to the vault. Standing at the door, you glanced at me for a moment before unlocking the vault door with a key around your neck.

Among neatly arranged treasures, the massive book you sought lay alone.

I thought you would rush to open it, but you didn’t. Holding my hand, you stood a distance away lost in thought. I won’t urge you to go if you decide not to.

How much time passed?

You exhaled deeply, turning to face me. Your small body enveloped me.

“It’ll be okay.”

Unable to respond, I silently embraced you. You still whispered in your gentle voice.

“I know how Leonel smiles, how strong he is. So, it’ll be okay even without me.”

You hugged me once and let go.

“Okay.”

As you answered with a strained voice, you smiled as if you were about to cry. Yet, as always, you went your chosen path. Following behind, you laid a thick, warm cloak where you would lie down.

Glancing at you momentarily, you drank the sleeping pills and lay on the cloak.

Finding it difficult to close the book alone, I unfolded it in your stead.

“Take care, Leonel.”

“Goodbye, Nelly.”

I kissed your forehead and covered you with the book. Slowly, without taking my eyes off you, I stepped back.

The light from the book enveloped you.

Your body became transparent. Gradually, only the book remained in the spot where you were.

Strangely, it wasn’t as despairing as if I couldn’t breathe. I just stood there for a while, staring at your traces.

The book lying open, rolling bottles with lids ajar.

And then, I stepped outside and locked the door.

I returned to everyday life. 

To those who wondered about your disappearance, I simply said you left. Just as you advised, I encouraged Faust constantly, and I appointed Lizzy to the assistant position after passing the administrative exams.

The poorly drawn flowers you left were always blooming on my desk.

Life flowed steadily. There was no agony or pain. However, when the longing for you became unbearable, I would visit your grave. 

I stood in front of it for a while when someone called me.

“Leonel.”

When I turned my head, Adelhardt was there. It was a connection you gave back to me before leaving. He stood beside me, looking down at the tombstone.

“You seem okay. I was worried when the woman pretending to be Nelly Pepper suddenly disappeared.”

“Bearable.”

In hindsight, all the farewells were abrupt. They came without warning, taking away things that belonged to me forever.

However, losing someone is something I cannot control, much like a natural disaster that cannot be avoided. What matters is what comes after. 

To live the remaining life, one must bid a proper farewell, even if alone for a long time. 

This, too, was something you taught me. Your words reassured me when things got tough.

Yet, the emptiness, as if a part of life had been completely excised, remained like a deep, dark hole struck by a chilling wind.

I silently contemplated my life and made a decision.

“Adelhardt, I have a favor.”

“What favor?”

“Help the new Altwood Duke settle in.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You understood.”

As I turned to enter the castle, Adelhardt followed.

“Wait. So, you’re saying you’ll hand over the duke’s position to someone else? Why now? Things have finally stabilized.”

If I told Adelhardt that I was giving up everything to be with you, would he understand?

‘Probably not.’

I lightly patted his shoulder and returned to the study. I called Roger, Levance, Arette, and Faust and told them I would step down from my position.

I told them that if they wanted, they could quit their jobs and pursue what they wanted. I assured them of full support. However, there was no one willing to leave.

I searched for a successor, entrusted Roger with the education, and organized the surroundings.

It took a few months to reach a point where my sudden disappearance wouldn’t cause problems.

Since I had already bid farewell in advance, I left only a short letter before departing.

[I leave for where life has a purpose, so take good care of the new duke.]

And then, I opened a drawer that had been closed for a long time. Inside were the spare key to the safe, sleeping pills, a newly obtained agate flask, and a small bottle the size of a palm.

Holding these items, I headed for the safe. Upon entering, I saw the book placed in the same way as when you left.

Flipping the book, the pages turned as if swept by the wind.

Soon, words appeared with a shimmering light.

“If you don’t want to come back, keep closing this book until you can break free from the flow of time.

What was once two will become one, and what disappeared will return.”

I pondered the meaning of this sentence dozens of times. And I concluded that I had to transcend the physical to reach you.

There was a possibility of failure, but compared to the hope of meeting you, the fear was insignificant and faint.

Leaning against the wall, I mixed sleeping pills, agate flask contents, and alcohol, and drank them all at once.

Placing the book on my legs, I closed my eyes, feeling consciousness slipping away.

I closed my eyes, hoping that when I opened them again, I would be by your side.

* * *

After bidding farewell to Leonel and falling asleep, when I regained consciousness, the first thing I felt was the heaviness of my body. 

Opening my eyes and looking down, I saw a massive book resting on top of me. Grunting, I managed to get out from under the book and stood up.

I looked around. I was not in the safe but in a study.

‘Did I come back? Am I back?’ 

I felt like I needed to meet someone to be sure. Without even organizing the messy books, I hastily went outside.

Even as I received greetings from the servants, there was still an uneasiness lingering in one corner of my heart. In my mind, there was only the thought of meeting Leonel.

My steps quickened. Soon, I was almost running through the corridors, flinging open the door to the study.

Leonel, who had been working with his back to the door, raised his head.

“Nelly.”

He stood up, looking at me with a gentle smile. In his red eyes, affection flickered warmly like a bonfire.

It was a distinctly different expression from the one Leonel had just moments ago.

So different that one couldn’t believe they were the same person.

As soon as I realized it, I felt like tears would well up. I ran toward him with all my strength, pulling Leonel’s waist as he approached.

Whether it was because his legs lost strength upon colliding with me, or because Leonel’s body, held by me, tilted backward, we both fell.

I ended up completely lying on Leonel’s legs, but I didn’t get up; instead, I buried my face in his side.

“Nelly.”

“Yes.”

“Are you okay?”

He tried to release my hand to look at me.

I held onto his waist tighter, burying my face even more into his side.

Leonel didn’t forcibly release my hand but instead embraced me, gently brushing my head and back with cautious touches.

“Who made you cry?”

Hearing those words, tears poured out again.

This was the Leonel I knew.

My fiancé. The person I love.

As the anxiety dissipated, the image of the Leonel I left behind flashed in my mind.

The Leonel who lost his ability to properly smile after losing me, like a rusty and toothless blade.

Relief and sorrow mixed. Eventually, in Leonel’s arms, I cried for a long time.

His comforting hands, tinged with confusion, continued to stroke me.

After a while, when my crying subsided a bit, Leonel asked with a worried voice.

“Weren’t you reading a book in the study?”

“Yes, uh, yes.”

“Looks like something happened in the study.”

If I said it, I felt like I would immediately get up and rush to the study. 

Somehow, I hesitated to show Leonel the book, so I sluggishly crawled up his comforting embrace, placing my arms around his neck.

Burying my face in the nape of his neck, I shook my head vigorously.

“Just, I fell asleep while reading the book and had a very, very sad dream.”

“Is that all?”

“Yeah.”

“If that’s the case, then I’m relieved.”

Feeling his warm and large hands, I calmed down a bit. Gasping for breath, Leonel released his arms.

“Now show me your face. Nelly.”

Taking a moment to look at his face again, my nose sniffled once more. I bit my lips and tried to hold back tears, but it didn’t work.

Sniffling, I tried to wipe my face with my sleeve, but Leonel grabbed my hand and lowered it.

Instead, he used the back of his hand to gently wipe my cheeks. His elegant fingertips delicately traced my eyes.

“You cried a lot. What kind of dream made you cry like this?”

“Just… just.”

“Maybe it’s better to take it easy today, Nelly.”

Nodding, I rested my head on his chest.

Leonel held me in his arms. 

Coming out of the study, he carried me to the bedroom, laid me on the bed, and lay down next to me, offering his arm.

While Leonel comforted my back, I couldn’t help but feel uneasy, thinking that I might wake up in a different place when I fell asleep.

Thanks to Leonel, I quickly calmed down. Still, thoughts of the Leonel I left behind occasionally crossed my mind.

‘I wonder if he’s doing well.’

Whenever there was an occasion to read a book in the study, I felt an impulse to check if Leonel was doing well.

I stroked the bookshelf and went outside the study. While locking the door, I felt a fleeting sensation behind me.

Wondering who might be running in the castle, I turned my head with the key hanging around my neck.

‘Is it Frer?’

He had only one reason to run around the castle – someone was hurt. Trying to follow him, I couldn’t see how fast he was as he disappeared.

Coincidentally, a servant who brought Frer came running, panting heavily.

I quickly grabbed him. 

“What’s going on?”

“The Duke has collapsed.”

“Leonel?”

“Yes, in his room…”

Before the servant could finish, my feet were already in motion. I rushed to the room and swung the door open.

There was no time to catch my breath. I approached the bed. He lay there with closed eyes, as if in a deep sleep.

I immediately asked Frer.

“What happened? Where does Leonel hurt? Until this morning, no, until just now, he was fine…”

“Calm down. There’s nothing wrong with his body.”

“But why did he collapse?”

“I don’t know. It doesn’t seem like overwork. I don’t know the reason.”

Sitting down beside the bed, I tightly held Leonel’s hand. 

Frer reassured me, placing his hand on my shoulder.

“No external or internal injuries. He didn’t hit anything when he fell, so he should wake up soon.”

“Yeah. Thank you.”

“Since I’ll be in the castle today, call me if anything happens.”

I nodded, and Frer left the room. I waited by Leonel’s side, hoping he would wake up.

Contrary to Frer’s words, Leonel didn’t wake up for a while. He twisted in bed occasionally, groaning as if tormented by a nightmare.

In the middle of this, Frer came in to check, but still, the cause of Leonel’s collapse couldn’t be found.

So the morning turned into half a day of anxiety.

I dozed off for a moment, and I felt the hand I was holding move. Wondering if he was tossing and turning again, I opened my eyes.

Then, I met his red eyes.

“Leonel?”

I called out to him with a trembling voice.

Leonel, without saying anything, carefully examined my face. Soon, tears rolled down his expressionless cheeks.

“Why? Where does it hurt?”

“No.”

He pulled my hand and laid me down next to him.

“Just had a sad dream.”

“Just fell asleep? Nothing hurts?”

“Yeah.”

He embraced me, sweeping my hair and back as he did on the day I returned.

“What kind of dream did you have for so long? I was worried.”

“A dream of you dying.”

His strong arms gently wrapped around my waist.

“I held you in my heart for three years alone. Then I lost you. But one day, you suddenly appeared.”

He lifted his head.

“You were right, Nelly. It got better.”

It was only then that I realized he wasn’t talking about the dream.

“Leonel? Are you Leonel? Did you come because of that book?”

Leonel nodded.

He seemed both happy and fearful. What happened to my Leonel then?

I sat up, releasing him. Leonel also stood up and leaned against the headboard.

“No need for that expression. It’s like you’ve come back to the past. I also felt like I had been to the future for about four years.”

“So,”

“Yes. I remember everything. You putting ear warmers on me, checking my heart while looking at the torch at the top of the tower after returning to the past. I remember it all.”

He lightly laughed and wrapped my cheeks, pulling me closer.

“I wished we were one.”

My heart swelled, and my nose tingled. I nodded my head, afraid that if I opened my mouth, I would burst into tears.

“It happened as you wanted, so there’s no need to cry, worry, or feel guilty.”

“Do you, resent me? I came leaving Leonel behind…”

“Not at all. I’m grateful. If it weren’t for you, I would have lived without knowing these happy things forever.”

“Leonel…”

I reached out, and he hugged me.

“You were right. It was better than I thought. But as it becomes calm, I realize it even more. My life is complete only when you’re there.”

“I’ve always thought the same. No matter where I go, my place to return is by Leonel’s side.”

“Then there’s no need to wait any longer.”

Curious about his words, I looked up.

He tenderly smiled and kissed me briefly.

“Marry me, Nelly.”

His red and transparent eyes were filled only with me.

I nodded and, instead of answering, kissed him.