“Why are you putting out the fire?”

Estella looked up from the darkness at the distant question. Light was peeking through the crack in the door. Diego stood on the threshold between inside and out, waiting for her answer. Estella answered in a hushed voice.

“I don’t feel like being in the light.”

Diego was silent for a moment, then asked.

“May I come inside?”

Estella only nodded. Apparently recognizing the permission, Diego stepped inside. The door closed quietly behind him. It was a full moon, so the room wasn’t as dark as he’d expected. Once his eyes adjusted, he could make out the clutter. The curtains, which had been so effective at blocking the sun’s rays until the morning, were no longer in place.

Dodging and kicking at things underfoot, Diego made his way to the bed where Estella sat, the one area that was still intact, but with shards of broken glass rolling across the floor. Diego clicked his tongue briefly.

“I’ve finished organizing the next room, so you can go sleep there tonight. I’ll get this one organized sometime tomorrow.”

In fact, Estella couldn’t care less if she fell asleep just like this. It was her who insisted on dismissing the maids who were unsure of what to do and attempting to tidy up the room. After barely calming Cedric down and sending him away, she herself needed time to console her own self. However, instead of refusing Diego’s persuasion, Estella simply nodded in silence. There were more important matters remaining for her to attend to.

“Why didn’t you tell me beforehand who used to live here?”

Estella’s question made Diego pause as he sat down next to her. The end of the mattress settled shallowly under his weight. Diego lifted his hand from between his thighs and scratched the back of his head. Then he answered.

“I don’t think you’d be happy if I told you it was her room.”

Diego added without a long pause.

“You might not believe it, but I did it because I wanted to give you the best.”

There was no response from Estella, which gave Diego time to look around again. ‘the best,” he said, but the room was in complete disarray, especially at night, when the holes and tear in the curtains gave it an eerie air.

Diego made a quick assessment.

“It’s completely messed up.”

“It’s a pity. When I visited in the morning, it was beautifully decorated. It was almost a shame that only a few people got to see it in its completed state.”

“I’ll repair it to your liking. I think it would be better to change the wallpaper this time.”

Somehow the room didn’t smell like it had been painted, and the wallpaper looked unchanged. She might have felt differently if she’d seen the former Duchess using it, but this was the first time Estella had been in here. Estella shrugged it off as if it didn’t matter.

“Never mind, it’s new enough as it is.”

With that, Estella wondered if Anna would have been satisfied that her taste had been preserved, or if she would have cursed fiercely. She suspect the latter. Although it was likely that she would have had the same reaction whether the wallpaper was changed or not.

Estella had always thought of herself as a caring person. But this incident reminded her that she could only be so considerate to people above a certain threshold. She felt so bad for Adriana when she decided to get engaged to Diego, but she didn’t mind taking Anna’s room. At this point, it’s the latter who is the clear owner.

Diego sighed at Estella’s blunt reaction. He sighed at Estella’s blunt response, as if she’d lost hope in him. He said, his voice full of sincerity.

“I didn’t think she’s come and run amok.”

“…….”

“I hadn’t quite figured her out yet. She wasn’t the kind of person who would stay down just because you stomped on her.”

Estella wasn’t angry that he had lifted the ban. He couldn’t keep a widowed woman locked up forever, not when public opinion was so unfavorable. Estella answered quietly.

“Since everything was taken away from her, it’s understandable that she would cause a commotion.”

“Are you angry at my carelessness?”

Diego asked, looking back at Estella. Estella tightened her grip on the hand that held her knee. Then she opened her dry lips to address him.

“Little Duke.”

“Tell me, what I can do to make you feel better.”

“Cedric knows.”

Estella’s answer was so far from what he’d expected that Diego didn’t immediately understand the words. He narrowed his eyes and asked.

“……What do you mean?”

“About the Duke and your father.”

Estella poured it out. Diego stiffened and said nothing for a moment. Estella just stared at him. There was a hint of panic in his eyes, but he didn’t seem as surprised as she was. After a moment, Diego asked in a calm voice.

“Did the Duchess tell him?”

Diego had a history of bragging about his killing to the Duchess, so it wouldn’t be surprising if she had told Cedric. Estella nodded at Diego’s question.

“She did.”

“And what did you do about it? I mean, you could have made excuses.”

“No, I didn’t, because Cedric already knew.”

“He did?”

Diego asked, swallowed hard. It was more of a self-deprecation than a sneer. Diego thought of all the times he’d spent with Cedric since Duke Estella’s death. One thought dominated his mind.

How well everyone had gotten along in this family game of fooling no one, a moment that would soon vanish like a mirage.

“Why did you reveal yourself as the culprit to the Duchess? Even if Cedric didn’t know, if you told that woman, Cedric would eventually find out……”

Estella stopped speaking as if blaming him. According to Anna’s words, she learned about Diego’s crime during the funeral. It was before Diego and Estella even discussed the survival of Cedric and Cecilia under the guise of a deal. At that time, Diego had contemplated killing both the children and Anna. So, it’s not surprising that he had no reservations about exposing his actions. True to form, Diego admitted it honestly.

“Because I didn’t think it would matter.”

“…….”

“I wanted to show off. That I broke them this much.”

In truth, Diego didn’t care about Cedric and Cecilia. He was at fault for erasing their father from their lives in the first place, and it was absurd for him to suddenly feel guilty just because Cedric found out.

Estella couldn’t blame him for that. In a way, Estella was Diego’s accomplice, and she hadn’t been honest with Cedric about it because she was afraid of disappointing him.

Diego asked in a gruff tone.

“What did Cedric say?”

“……He said if you were going to kill him, he hopes you’d do it quickly, that child.”

Diego chuckled at Estella’s answer. He rubbed his hands together to dry his face. He knew it was ridiculous for a child who had only lived eight years to talk about death. The childish smile slowly faded from his face. He pulled his hand away from his face and spoke.

“You know what?”

“…….”

“On the day my brother wished for death, I finally received the title. As the next head of the family, I have even completed the new lineage oath to the king. The official name to call me now is Duke of Berta.”

Diego had been away since the early hours of the morning because of a royal summons. Diego pledged his allegiance to the crown and finally succeeded in taking over the family name. He had earned the inheritance his father never wanted to give him. Diego said with a hint of glee in his voice.

“Isn’t it funny, the Duke of Berta, following in the footsteps of my father, the name I despised so much.”

Diego’s gaze rolled slowly toward Estella. Gone was the warmth of his eyes, and his face was unfamiliarly cold.

“I am the one who killed my father and inherited his title. What right do I have to cover up all these sins and deceive those children?”

“…….”

“The play is over, it’s just time to admit it.”

He asserted, his voice deadly cold. Estella felt as if she were going to cry. If the Duchess hadn’t revealed the information, could they have gone on lying to each other forever, or should they be grateful she’d opened the wound before it festered?

Estella asked, unwilling to admit it.

“If I told you I believe that we can start over, would you consider it foolish?”

“You’re expecting the impossible.”

“Cedric sincerely liked you.”

“That can’t be true.”

“Duke… He mentioned that you saved him. When he was being dragged away by his mother, you unexpectedly helped him.”

Diego didn’t remember. In the first place, Diego had only recently learned of Anna’s abuse. Even if Cedric’s gratitude was unintentional, Diego didn’t deserve it, and yet Estella acted as if it was some great thing that would solve the problem.

“That’s why Cedric was hoping, too, that the Duke wasn’t such a bad brother to him, that maybe you could make up afterward, that maybe you could get along like normal brothers, and…….”

“When that expectation ripened enough, I killed my father.”

“….”

“I don’t know. It’s doubtful whether those kids resented father as much as I did, and even if they did, wouldn’t it be somewhat amusing in its own way if a bunch of depraved children, devoid of humanity, gathered together?”

Diego grunted in response. His mood sank as he remembered Cecilia and Cedric’s laughter. A cold pit sank into his stomach, even though he had never cared for them in the first place. Diego stared at Estella with his molded eyes.

“I didn’t kill Cedric and Cecilia like you said, but that doesn’t change the fact that they lost their father because of me.”

Even after he spoke, Diego didn’t move his gaze from Estella. Not to chastise her for harboring unattainable hopes. He asked, genuinely curious.

“Teacher, teach me. Is there a way for us to go back?”

Estella had no answer. She didn’t have a great solution. In the first place, she was an outsider to their family. It was unlikely that someone with a different last name could solve Berta’s problems. But Estella didn’t immediately throw up her hands. She saw in Diego’s resigned demeanor a glimmer of hope.

She thought back to the first time she and Diego had met. She suddenly felt compassion for a man who had been nothing more than a book hero, a serial killer. He wasn’t the only one who imagined a ‘better him.’ Every time she saw a glimpse of humanity in him, she imagined the man he might have become under different circumstances. It was around this time that she had new expectations for him.

When Estella initially advised Diego to take care of his younger siblings, it was because she believed they needed him. However, as she observed the changes in him, Estella gradually began to consider the opposite. Perhaps it was Diego who needed those children. They were shining individuals precisely because they existed in the midst of his failures.

“I guess we can’t go back, it’s already happened.”

Estella opened her mouth to answer, and Diego closed his eyes in response. Estella knew all too well that you can’t change the past, but being hurt doesn’t mean you have to live in pain forever. Even the most painful things heal eventually, and eventually they become dull. Change is generally accepted as sad, but it doesn’t always have to be bad.

Living beings cannot put a period to my emotions. This time, Estella decided to believe in that imperfection.

Estella quietly laid her hand over Diego’s. Diego reflexively looked back at her. Estella spoke as if to reassure him.

“But you can change.”

That their broken relationship could change after all.