Episode 18

“Se-yeon-ah…”

“Ah…”

I was rendered dumbfounded. In this moment, there was nothing to say or do, and nothing I wanted to hear. In an instant, the lovely garden had devolved into a nightmare.

My entire body was trembling, and my heart felt like it was about to burst out of my chest. My face became ghostly white.

I closed my eyes for a second, and when I opened them, he was staring at me with sad eyes, thinner than he had been two years before.

I felt the pressure to say something, but my mind was blank. My mouth opened without intention, and I couldn’t believe he was standing there. Why? Why? Why was he here? His eyes darted back and forth with growing intensity.

As he scrutinized my face, he clenched his fists as though gathering courage and took a step closer. I took a step back. He advanced another step, and I hesitantly retreated. The pain seemed to wash over his face as I backed away.

As I observed the situation, I came to a sudden halt. I felt foolish for my fear and avoidance. After a moment of calming down, I realized there was no valid reason for me to avoid him.

“I’ll act as if you didn’t place an order,” I said, stepping forward. But when I tried to walk past him, he extended his hand towards me.

“Don’t touch me!” I yelled, pushing his hand away just as he reached for my hand. I wasn’t sure why I was running away, but I couldn’t bring myself to face him.

As I hurried down the stairs, I encountered Jimin, who was on her way up.

“Where are you going?” Jimin inquired.

“I have something urgent to attend to. I’ll see you later,” I replied. Jimin tried to say something further, but his words were lost on me as I fled.

My wrist was stinging painfully, and I sprinted back to the flower shop. I ran so quickly that I felt queasy, with my breath catching in my throat.

“Boss, it looks like you’re about to pass out. Are you sure you’re alright?” Soo-jung asked.

“Yes, I’m fine,” I managed to respond, sinking back into my chair, my heart still pounding in my chest.

Amid the whirlwind of emotions, I found myself uncertain about my state. My heart was still racing from the unexpected encounter, and my breath felt heavy as I tried to catch it.

I bit my lip, remembering the pained expression on his face when I had swatted his hand away. As my heart continued to race, I pressed my palm to my chest, feeling it pounding against my hand, faster and faster.

Eventually, the pulsating rhythm in my head became too much to bear, and I had to take a headache pill to quell the pain. When I attempted to smile in an attempt to reassure Soo-Jung, it only seemed to harden her expression further.

The memory of his pained expression lingered in my mind like an afterimage. I shook my head, but I couldn’t shake the turmoil I felt. I had taken a pill for the headache, but deep down, I knew it wouldn’t be enough to calm the storm of emotions inside me.

My composure had cracked, and I couldn’t hide my turmoil from Soo-Jung, who urged me to go home and rest. Although I wasn’t necessarily sad, my eyes were glassy, reflecting the internal struggle that had taken over my thoughts and feelings.

“Soojung, I apologize, but I need to head home first.”

“Don’t fret about it, go on and leave.”

“Thank you. I’ll tidy up and make an early departure today.”

“Are you certain you don’t want to consider going to the hospital?”

“……Yes, I’m okay.”

I felt tempted to go to the hospital and get admitted if it meant feeling better. However, I was aware they couldn’t fix it, so I grabbed my car keys and got up.

Typically, I walk back home, but I couldn’t wait to reach home and rest. Upon arriving home, I reclined on the couch without changing out of my clothes.

I shielded my eyes with my arms and took slow, deliberate breaths. I entertained the hope that a few hours of sleep might alleviate the pounding in my head, but sleep eluded me.

A furrow formed on my brow. There was a faint rustling sound outside the door, most likely someone cleaning the hallway, and I sighed at how even that minor noise was bothering me.

“Oh dear.” I forced myself to stand, convinced that a beer and some rest were in order. I positioned myself in front of the fridge and poured a beer.

I could sense the beer’s warmth traveling down my esophagus. I wiped the beer from my chin with the back of my hand and crumpled the empty can.

The cell phone I had thrown on the couch started ringing. I tossed the dented beer can into the sink and made my way to the couch. “Hello?”

-It was Jimin.

“It’s …….”

-You suggested we have a meal together before. When do you want to meet?

I hesitated for a moment, feeling unsure about seeing the two people she worked with casually. Jimin’s voice grew more insistent as if she sensed my hesitation.

-You promised. When can we schedule this? Let’s decide quickly.

“…… I don’t think I can make it this week, maybe next week. I promised my mom that I would go home this weekend.”

-I’ll make a reservation. I know a good butcher.

“Okay.”

I ended the call and sank back onto the couch, feeling a bit lightheaded even though I had only consumed a single can of beer.

My stomach grumbled, reminding me of its emptiness. It was one of those days when, despite the slight assistance of beer, sleep remained elusive.

* * *

“Eat a lot.”

“I’ll eat well.”

As promised, I visited my family’s house over the weekend. The moment I walked through the door, my stomach, which had just started to settle, threatened to act up again due to my mom’s nagging, as if she had been waiting for me. It wasn’t until my dad stood beside me and asked her to stop that she relented.

I had barely taken a spoonful of rice when she turned her attention to me.

“But you.”

I remained silent, chewing my rice and sitting up a bit straighter.

“Don’t you have a boyfriend?”

“……No.”

“Then I’m in the queue; would you like to take a look?”

The rice on my plate lost its flavor, and as I set my spoon down, my dad, seated beside me, gently patted my shoulder.

“……Mom,” I spoke, my stony expression causing my mom’s eyes to gleam with anticipation, unable to decipher my feelings.

My gaze dropped. “I truly wish to live on my own.”

The atmosphere in the room grew chilly as if a bucket of cold water had been poured over me.

“Because I am not good enough!” I wondered how many times I had to repeat the same sentiment, and my dad’s voice boomed as he intervened in the ongoing battle between my mom’s insistence on me getting married and my determination not to.

“…I don’t have a man to kick in the eye.” Today, I decided to back down, unwilling to create a scene.

“There’s no man for you because you don’t want to meet him.”

I couldn’t help but be annoyed by the scenario.

This was the reason I was hesitant to return home. I’m getting tired of having to repeat myself every time I visit.

“I’m content with my life now, and I’m happy, so please, understand.”

“What? I’m not giving up on your marriage!”

I shut my eyes and felt every throb in my left temple. I pressed down, but it only seemed to amplify the throbbing sensation.

“I’ll leave first.”

“You only have one daughter, what’s so difficult about granting her wishes? What’s so challenging about having a meal together?”

“If that’s how you wanted to get married… I’ll leave.”

“Don’t talk to me!” my father growled as I took my suitcase from the living room and walked to the front entrance. I shook my head, feeling as if I had let him down.

“Dad, I’m going now.”

“Okay.”

I tried to force a smile with the corners of my mouth that refused to turn upwards. My mother grumbled from the kitchen, asking me not to come back.

“Your mom, too.”

“I’m sorry.”

“There’s nothing for you to be sorry about.”

I wrapped my arms around my father’s waist, and he affectionately caressed my back.

“I know your mom cares about you, even if she talks like that.”

He slowly nodded.

“I’ll come back.”

“Don’t overwork yourself.”

“……Yes,” I said, clutching my father’s arms like an idiot.

“Travel and enjoy good food.”

“Yeah.”

“Come on.”

I got inside the car after he waved me off. My cold heart started to warm.

On weekends, I usually manage my flower store, but it had been a while since I’d been there. I didn’t want to rush back home, so I drove to a neighboring location.

I looked at the sunset and tried to calm down. The fact that she had moved in next door didn’t disturb me. My life was entirely mine. It was completely dark when I finally got home.

A shiver rushed down my spine as I opened the communal front door. The piercing stares made the hairs on the back of my neck rise.

I wanted to just walk in, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to sleep if I did. So I mustered the courage to turn around.

 “…….” No one was present this time. I jumped to my feet and ran upstairs. I breathed a sigh of relief as soon as I shut the door behind me. I flipped the light switch, and the dark house was illuminated.

Is it possible that I left a window open? My thoughts raced, looking for an answer. I bit my lower lip tightly, apprehension pouring through me. I explored the house with shaky hands, examining closets and rooms, but no one was found.

I sat back down on the couch, wiping my brow with my sleeve. Since he appeared, I’ve felt on edge all the time. The one saving grace was that he hadn’t appeared since.

My head throbbed with pain as I let out a long, tired sigh. I closed my eyes briefly, knowing I had to push myself to open them, if only for work. A warm bath may help to relieve some of the strain.

* * *

“I’ve heard the meat here is exceptional.”

“Really?”

“You can’t even get a table here without a reservation.”

When I observed Jimin enthusiastically patting her stomach, I laughed. I expected to feel apprehensive and embarrassed about our meeting, but when it came, those fears appeared to fade. Ha-young wrapped her arm around my shoulders and encouraged me to come in.

At first sight, the restaurant appeared to be quite upmarket. I told the hostess I had a reservation, and after I gave her my name, she directed me to a private room. I started taking off my shoes in front of the sliding door.

“Ms. Jimin or Ms. Ha-Young?”

“Oh my God, Mr. Shin, what are you doing here?”

As she was about to enter the room, Mr. Shin halted and turned around upon hearing a familiar voice.

“What’s up, I’m here to eat. Look who it is, Ms. Se-yeon. It’s been a while.”

It was Secretary Shin. Mr. Shin’s outstretched hand beckoned for a handshake.

“Yes, Mr. Shin. How are you?” I extended my hand to shake him, and she responded by shaking it up and down, clearly thrilled to see me.

“Come on, let’s eat together.”

“Sure? Hohoho.” I was about to decline when Jimin intervened.

“Are you okay, Se-yeon?” Secretary Shin, who was beaming at me, couldn’t refuse. When I nodded, he grabbed my wrist and brought me into the adjoining room. “I’m here to dine with the boss,” he said.

Her expression altered when he sat up and established eye contact with me. Slowly, he blinked.

“Hello?” he said, extending his hand, and making me bite my lower lip in disbelief. His eyes were drawn briefly to the ring before fading.

“Se-yeon, what are you doing?” I couldn’t show my annoyance in front of the others, so I hesitantly offered my hand. His huge hand clutched my hand firmly.

I attempted to pull my hand away, but the grip just became tighter. I twisted my wrist in an attempt to free myself, which appeared to irritate him. I cast a glimpse at him, and he swiftly averted his gaze.

“This is where we ate dinner, so you two are also here.”

“Yes. The meat is the best here, Se-Yeon, so eat a lot because the boss is going to treat you.”

” It’s …….”

I sat across from him, and his intense gaze made my face feel flushed. I was engaged in a conversation with someone else, but the fact that he was seated in front of me and staring at me was truly bothering me. I despised it.

“Here, have some of this.”

As he placed the meat in my bowl, my face froze. His hand trembled slightly as if he was aware of the impact he was having on me.

“You’ve changed quite a bit, haven’t you, boss? You even grill meat?”

“……Yes.”

“He’s always grilling meat for us at company dinners. I wonder if he’s gotten strange since he left Royal Group.”

I lowered my head and looked at the three persons who had gotten closer to him. He felt impelled to eat the meat, attempting to avoid their keen gaze. He was grilling the meat but not eating any of it.

“You’re eating quite a bit.”

“……”

I diverted my glance from him and continued to sip with the remainder of the group.

As the hours passed, I alternated between ignoring him and staring at him openly, as if testing his patience. His piercing, jet-black gaze pierced mine.

“Thank you.”

“Ms. Ha-Young, are you going in the same direction as me? Come on, I’ll drop you off on the way.”

“Okay, Ms. Se-yeon, take care, everyone, take care!” Mr. Ha-young said goodbye as she drove away in Secretary Shin’s car, her voice loud and slightly tipsy.

“Se-yeon, let’s take the boss’s car. He hasn’t been drinking.”

“……I’ll just take a taxi….”

“What’s the point of taking a taxi this late at night? Get in.”

Jimin, who hadn’t drunk any alcohol, was indecisive. She insisted on not leaving me alone and pushed me into the passenger seat.

I sighed as she closed the door and sat in the backseat. As he took the wheel, I felt uneasy.

“Oh, he’s picking us up. Se-yeon, take care.”

“What? Jimin?”

“Boss, please take Se-yeon home! Goodbye!” Before I could respond, Jimin had already exited the car. I rubbed the back of my neck, feeling awkward as I sat alone in the vehicle. I turned my head to glimpse Jimin, who had disappeared into the distance.

“I’m planning to take a taxi.”

“I’ll drive you.”

I replied with a half-hearted protest.

“No, thank you.”

“I insist.” His voice seemed to take on a pleading tone.

“No, I’d rather not. Taxis are more comfortable,” I replied, the more distant, the better. I leaned my head back.

“Even if it’s less comfortable… just come along.”

“How can I come along if it’s uncomfortable? A taxi is much more comfortable.”

As I was about to exit the car, he placed his hand on my shoulder. In response, I forcefully swatted his hand away.

“Don’t touch my body.”

I could hear him stepping out of the car behind me, but I swiftly hailed a taxi. After informing the driver of my destination, I rested my head against the window and closed my eyes.

I couldn’t shake my suspicion of Jimin and Ha-Young. Out of all the restaurants, at all the hours, and at all the times, why was he in the adjacent room? I started to wonder if he was even in the building next door intentionally. What if they came here with a purpose? My stomach churned noisily.

* * *

It’s the kind of time of year when cardigans alone can’t shield you from the cold. I patted my puffy coat with my hand, and Jimin’s gaze fixated on my hand.

Today, Soo-jung had her day off. She had been kept busy due to a sudden surge in customers, and when a message arrived, she had no choice but to accept Ms. Jimin’s invitation to visit and admire the flowers.

Ms. Jimin appeared just in time for lunch, holding two bento boxes filled with her renowned delicious food.

We enjoyed the bento and shared some tea. As I took a sip of the hot tea, I absently traced my fingers along the rim of my coffee cup, while Jimin focused her gaze on my face.

“Se-yeon, you have such a small face, how do you fit those eyes and nose in it?”

“What?”

“It’s beautiful.” The boss’s comment hung in the air.

“What? I didn’t catch that.”

I continued sipping my hot coffee, missing the remainder of the conversation.

“You didn’t need to hear it.” I glanced at Jimin, who was tugging at her jaw and grinning. “What do you think the boss said?”

“Jimin, by the way…….”

“I told you to call me sister.”

“Ah……. Yes.”

The word “sister” didn’t quite roll off my tongue. I took a sip of coffee and glanced at Jimin.

“By the way…….”

“Um.”

“……It’s nothing.”

“Interesting.”

I attempted to ask her if she was aware of my relationship, but the words got stuck. As I closed my mouth, Ms. Jimin smiled and affectionately stroked her stomach.

My gaze fixated on Jimin’s swollen belly, appearing as if it could pop at any moment. Sensing my gaze, Ms. Jimin grinned and caressed her belly.

“When is the baby due?”

“Very soon, it’s the last month.”

As I watched her hand on her belly, Jimin got up and approached.

“Do you want to feel it?”

I shook my head.

“It’s fine. Go ahead and touch it.”

“……”

“It’s moving quite actively these days.”

I tentatively extended my hand and placed it on Jimin’s stomach.

“Oh, it’s moving!” Jimin’s eyes widened, and she withdrew her hand.

“Are you surprised?”

“More than surprised…….” I stuttered, unable to continue.

“Me too, I still can’t believe it.”

She nodded.

“Come visit me when you have your baby.”

“Can I?”

“Of course.”

She mentioned it was her daughter. Jimin grumbled about her frequent trips to the bathroom in the early mornings these days.

“I never thought I’d have kids either; I was single. But then he met me, we got married, and within two months, we had a baby.”

You never really know what life has in store, Jimin whispered.

“It looks good.”

“Yeah. I’m so happy.”

Seeing Jimin’s genuinely joyful expression made me smile, but the lingering feeling of unease persisted. After Jimin left, I remained seated and stared at the flowers, unable to shake off my sinking mood.

“Ms. Se-yeon. I’m back.”

I must have been sitting there for quite a while, my coffee cup untouched. The sound of the door opening caused me to turn my head, revealing Mr. Hyun Woo standing in the doorway.

“I just happened to be passing by. Can I get a cup of coffee?”

“Oh, sure. Have a seat.”

“I brought you a cake, so let’s share it.”

I retrieved a slice of cake and placed it in front of Mr. Hyunwoo, who was waiting.

“You seem to be coming here quite often these days.”

“So, you don’t like it?” Instead of replying, she offered a slight smile and searched for a fork. She returned with a fork and extended it.

“The cake here is delicious, so I thought you might enjoy it.”

“It is…….”

“You don’t drink coffee?”

“Yeah, I had some not too long ago.”

“I see. I’ll have your coffee then.”

He nodded, smiled, and dug his fork into the cake. Despite my attempt to lift my spirits with a sweet treat, I couldn’t help but feel that my mood remained unchanged.

“Se-Yeon?”

“What?”

“There’s an incoming call.”

“Oh, sorry.”

I turned my back to Hyunwoo, who signaled for me to take the call and answered.

“Yeah, Miho.”

– “Where are you?”

“Huh?”

– “I’m in Korea.”

“What?” Miho, who was supposed to be in the United States, raised her voice when she mentioned Korea. Mr. Hyunwoo’s eyes widened, and she seemed to inquire about what was happening. I shook my head, indicating that it was nothing.

“Suddenly? Without letting me know?”

– “What’s going on?” I inquired.

Miho had been occupied in the United States. If she had come to Korea unexpectedly without notifying me, something significant must have occurred.

– “I’ll go see you. I owe you one.”

“Okay, come to the flower shop.”

I placed my phone on the table, and Hyun-woo regarded me with curiosity.

“Who’s coming?”

“Oh, a friend.”

“Well, they’re coming as well, but I’ll head off now. I’m just making a quick stop.”

As he rose to leave, I caught a faint whiff of cigarette smoke.

“Mr. Hyun-woo, do you smoke?”

“Yes? Yeah. Can you smell it?” I chuckled awkwardly since I had never seen Hyunwoo smoke before.

“If you don’t like the smell of cigarettes, do you want me to quit?”

“No, it’s okay…….”

I avoided making eye contact with Mr. Hyunwoo, feeling awkward about telling him to stop smoking when it was none of my business whether he did or did not. When I heard the door open, I turned around.

“Come in……”

I had expected a guest, but when I saw the man in the black suit at the door, my jaw fell. His hands were tucked into his pockets, and his head was turned away from me. His eyes twitched just a little. He walked into the room and looked at both Hyun-woo and me.

“Make a flower arrangement for me,” I said, my mouth wide open. Was he addressing me? He never spoke to me in such a disrespectful manner when we were alone. But he acted differently in front of other people.

“Include roses. Make it beautiful.”

“You two must know each other.” I turned to Mr. Hyun-woo, who gazed at me inquisitively.

“Yes.”

I turned my head abruptly to give him a disapproving look as the words spilled from his lips, but he remained undisturbed.

“I haven’t seen you in a while.”

“What color of roses would you like?” I said, giving him a sharp look to signal him to be silent. He obeyed by sealing his lips. Mr. Hyunwoo’s face got stiff, and I couldn’t figure out how the two men interacted. Mr. Hyunwoo breathed heavily as he ran his fingers through his hair.

“Ms. Se-yeon, I’m going to take my leave.”

For some reason, my tone came out as harsh, and I experienced Hyun-woo’s awareness of his presence behind me.

“Take care.”

“When are we going to see that movie, by the way?” I glanced at Mr. Hyunwoo, purposefully raising my voice so he could hear.

“On the weekend, right?”

I had completely forgotten about our plan to watch a movie. Sensing my hesitation, Mr. Hyunwoo took a step closer.

“I’ve been looking forward to our movie outing, but I’d be disappointed if you say you can’t make it.”

“It’s ……. I’ll go this weekend.”

“Really? I’ll give you a call.”

When Mr. Hyunwoo looked at her in surprise, she smiled as she stretched out and pretended to remove something from his hair.

“You had something in your hair.”

I extended my hand to show him what it was.

“Thank you.”

“I’ll be leaving now, so please go inside.”

“Alright. Stay safe.”

Mr. Hyunwoo gestured for me to head inside, noting the cold weather. I nodded and entered the flower shop, feeling his lingering presence outside as he watched me.

“I don’t sell flowers. Go away.”

I glared at him, my brow furrowing.

“Come on. You asked me what color I wanted earlier.” I couldn’t believe how shameless I had become. “That’s-“

“Never mind, go away.”

“I needed the flowers, I’m a customer.”

“You appeared to be wearing a steel plate on your face.” I bit my lower lip firmly. I didn’t want to make a flower arrangement for my ex-girlfriend and sexual companion, but I couldn’t help myself.

“Do you want me to add some baby’s breath?”

“No, I prefer vibrant colors, so just red roses.”

I felt like I was on the verge of collapsing.

“Hello?”

While he was on the phone, I took hold of the basket. It was probably the largest one in our flower shop.

“Yeah. You’re already here, okay, I’ll be right there.”

I carried on with my work, maintaining a smile, and acted as if I hadn’t noticed when he ended the call and started placing the trimmed roses into the floral foam. He stood alongside me, silently watching the process.

“It’s done.”

“It looks beautiful,” he replied, but why was He saying it in such a hushed tone? He most likely thought I was complementing the floral arrangement. He averted his look as I scratched my card. I didn’t close my eyes.

“Why?”

“Do you want to watch a movie?”

“Yeah.”

I averted my gaze, and he smiled wryly. It was ridiculous. What difference did it make whether I watched a movie or not?

“Thanks. I’ll be right back.”

“Goodbye.”

He was courteous, just like a customer. That was all there was to it, nothing more or less than a customer. A cool air came in through the gap as he opened the door and walked outside. I was startled awake. I looked out the window and realized I’d need to wear something warmer the next day.

I saw a familiar face in front of the flower shop. I remembered. His fiancée was the Royal Group’s only daughter. I saw her smile at him before looking away as he handed over the flower basket.

She felt a surge of rage growing within him as she cleaned up the mess she’d made. I detested him so much. Why just in front of me? I was biting my lower lip so hard that I didn’t realize it was bleeding.

“Do you think that’s going to mend things?”

“……Miho.”

I hadn’t realized that Miho was here, but she entered with a gust of cold air and pinched my cheek.

“Hey, that hurts!”

“Are you upset with a friend you haven’t seen in a while?” I whacked her on the back of the head, and she rolled her eyes. Miho grumbled something as I gestured for her to sit on the chair while I cleaned up the leftover mess.

“Why are you in such a foul mood?”

“……”

“Are you annoyed that I came without calling you?”

“It’s not like that. Would you like to have something delicious?”

I felt bad for making her see my annoyance, so I suggested something tasty.

“No, I’ll make kimchi stew. You have your mom’s kimchi, right?”

“Yes.”

“Let’s have rice with rolled omelets.”

My mouth watered at the prospect of finally tasting Miho’s food.

“Let’s go grocery shopping. I only have beer at home.”

“I had a feeling.”

Stroking my hair, I hugged Miho tightly around the waist as she smiled sheepishly.

“I’m sorry for being bothersome,”

“Yeah,”

“It’s nice to see you,”

“Yeah,”

Miho’s comforting touch made me feel a little better. Indeed, friends are the best.

I went to work the next day with a full stomach. I’d had too much to drink the day before. I’d lost track of how much I drank. It was one of the few occasions I had indulged in such a way.

It was strange not to drink with a long-lost acquaintance and snacks served by a friend I had missed. I ran my hand through my hair, thinking that if I drank like I did yesterday, I wouldn’t be myself.

Miho had clung to me the day before, crying and cursing Jiu. Those two may make a romantic connection interesting.

I dashed to the flower shop’s door to get some cold coffee, but I came to a halt. Someone had gathered in front of the flower shop.

“Are you heading to work?” Oh, yeah! Han Se-hyuk was there. I opened the entrance to the flower store, turning my head indifferently. I could feel him gazing at me from behind, but I didn’t want to engage in conversation.