Episode 16

Everything returned to normalcy once I had made up my mind. I no longer had to be concerned about his impassive expression, nor did I have to wonder when he would contact me.

In this fashion, time continued to pass. It was amazing how easy it had become to enjoy meals with him as colleagues without making eye contact. At the same time, I could understand his sister’s feelings.

I had gotten insight into many facets of life after being an inattentive youngster when it came to him. My understanding got deeper over time, and my heart became more resilient.

I couldn’t sleep tonight, so I opened a can of beer and sipped it. The same television shows played indefinitely, like an endless cycle.

My laughter rang out in the room as I burst out laughing at a moment devoid of humor. I drew my knees up tight and hid my face behind them. I shook the lighter beer can, debating whether to get another. A thump resounded, and I came to a halt in my actions. My attention was drawn quickly to the source of the noise. Thud. Thud. Thud.

A disturbing sequence of knocks on the door made me hesitate. I sucked anxiously and got up from my seat. Should I get in touch with Miho? No, calling the cops would be faster.

“Cha Se-Yeon…” said a voice, sending shivers down my spine.

A slight murmur from outside seemed to beckon me, so I turned on the intercom. However, the screen view displayed nothing. I tightened my grasp on my phone and dialed 112.

Another impact resonated with the tension.

“Who is this?” I asked as I attempted to hit the call button.

“Cha Se-yeon.. Open the door,” said the voice, its words garbled and tinted with drunkenness. Han Se-hyuk was unmistakable. I put down my phone and tried to open the door, only to find it blocked by a person seated in front of it.

I tried to force it open, but it remained stubbornly closed.

“Si-Hyuk, move aside, you’re blocking the door.”

“Cha Se-Yeon…” was the reply.

As I wrestled with him for about twenty minutes, beads of sweat gathered on my brow. My head hung low, heavy, and wet like a soaked cotton ball.

“Please move,” I pleaded, as he slowly lifted his head to meet my gaze. With his eyes half-lidded and unfocused, it was clear how inebriated he was. His pupils were dilated, and he appeared confused.

I assisted him in departing by sneaking through the half-open door. He was a big man, and his drunkenness made him feel a lot heavier than usual.

“For God’s sake, pull yourself together,” I pleaded, sweat streaming down my brow.

“I’m just going to let it go,” I said quietly, holding his face and trying not to make too much noise. His pupils struggled to focus as his eyelids flickered open and close.

“Get up,” I urged, and he seemed to understand as he pushed himself up with my help. I was drenched in perspiration by the time I got him home. I tried to put him on the couch at first, but it was clear that it wasn’t the perfect fit for his size, so I carefully moved him to the bed.

Once he was settled on the bed, I realized I might not have the strength to lift him again. I observed him curled up on the bed, my breathing heavy.

Each breath was agonizing as if I had just completed a hundred laps around the track and my lungs had been ripped apart. My hands trembled as I absentmindedly pulled a strand of hair away from my brow and gave him a challenging look.

“……”

Could I be wrong in thinking he looked lonely curled up in his bed? I leaned in closer to see his slumbering face distorted with frustration. I used to like the way he made that particular expression and would purposely provoke him, even though he never genuinely became upset with me.

I reached over and unbuttoned his tie, as well as two buttons on his shirt. His face eventually relaxed, the strain dissipating.

I held his face in my gaze for an extended moment. Then, as I turned to pour myself a cup of honey, he seized my wrist.

In an instant, I found myself ensnared in his arms, my vision blurred and my eyes rolling back in my head.

“Let go of me,” I pleaded, raising my eyes to meet his as he held me in a suffocating grip, refusing to release me.

“Se-yeon… Cha Se-yeon.”

“……”

His eyes remained closed, presumably unaware that he was still grasping me.

“Se-yeon… Cha Se-yeon…….”

Every time he said my name, my heart pounded with a pounding sensation that felt like it would break. I had told myself that everything was fine, so why did it pain every time my name came out of his mouth?

“Se-yeon…”

While he continued to shout my name in a melancholy tone, I softly touched his face. His face looked distorted as if he was about to cry.

I kept thinking, “I shouldn’t have let go of your hand back then.” I should have just opened myself to you and revealed everything, staying by your side. I closed my eyes and buried my face in his chest.

I couldn’t quantify how much I longed for this moment. Even with my eyes closed, tears welled up, but I clenched my teeth to hold back the sobs.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” I murmured, tightening my arms around his waist. “I’m sorry for still loving you. I’m sorry.”

He reciprocated by enveloping me with his arms and legs, drawing me closer in a tight embrace.

His embrace produced a soothing warmth that enticed me to stay in his arms endlessly. It also roused the dormant desires I’d been suppressing for so long, coaxing them to the surface.

I drifted into slumber against his chest, experiencing a rare moment of stillness in bed, where nothing tumultuous occurred. Upon waking, I sat up for a moment, feeling disoriented.

The man who had caused me so much grief the day before was noticeably gone from the bed. “He never sleeps more than two or three hours,” his sister’s remarks came as a bitter reminder, stabbing my heart.

I smoothed down my hair and stepped into the living room, where the scent of food wafted from the kitchen. He sat at the kitchen table, sipping on coffee, seemingly unaware of how he had upset me the day before.

He remained oblivious, and that’s why he appeared so carefree. I contemplated opening up to him about it but ultimately chose not to.

“When did you wake up?” he inquired, and as I drew nearer, his gaze, which had been fixed on the table, shifted to me.

His intense look raced over me from head to toe, and he gently placed his coffee cup on the table, his attention never leaving me as I climbed to my feet.

“Eat and go to work; I’ll be there before you,” he said.

I remained mute.

As he approached, I smelled his fragrance, the same scent that had enveloped us intimately all night. It was most likely his aroma, hopelessly blended with mine, that was imparted throughout our long embrace.

A wry chuckle slipped out of me. I quickly lowered my head to conceal it, but he halted in his stride. When I glanced back at him, he continued walking as if nothing had occurred.

I rested the back of my head against his chest, unwavering, until he opened the door and left. A bitter smile crept onto my face.

I sat on the couch, toying with my phone and dialing a number.

– “I had a feeling you’d be awake, you’re an early bird.”

-Thank you, curse word. In any case, why did you call?

“Miho… It’s me, the American you were talking about…”

* * *

I hadn’t heard from him since his drunken visit to my doorway two weeks before. I felt like I was wasting my time, but my own life was too frantic to pay attention to him.

I went to see my mother, inquired about my father, and gave her the rest of my money. I inquired as to where she received it, but she remained silent.

Yesterday, I gathered my belongings and handed them to Miho.

“Okay. I’ll see you at the airport tomorrow. I’ll see you at the airport tomorrow. Okay. Okay?”

A genuine nag. I ended the call and took a deep breath, my hand gripping the phone trembling. I stood in front of my boss’s office, hesitating as I raised and lowered my hand several times.

Exhaling deeply, I shut my eyes tightly and then opened them, as if reminding myself of something. Ding. I heard a knock on the door, but no one replied.

Summoning my courage, I knocked once more and cautiously pushed the door open. The creaking sound of the door sent a shiver down my spine.

As I entered, my boss was seated at his desk, and it appeared as if his eyes widened slightly.

I briefly considered that I might have made a mistake, but I didn’t want to retreat. Instead, I moved closer to him, gazing at a face I wouldn’t see until the next day.

“Are you still working?” I inquired.

When I heard his professional tone of voice, my fingertips quivered and I unconsciously gripped at my skirt. His hazel eyes latched upon my cotton hold before slipping downward.

The loud gulp that followed left me feeling exposed.

“What’s the matter, Ms. Cha?”

He screamed out my name, first in a begging tone, then with a chill that sent shivers down my spine. My breathing became erratic, but I worked hard to keep it hidden from him.

We locked eyes, and the silence between us grew heavy. His lips tensed as if he were deep in thought. I shifted my weight from foot to foot, all the while maintaining my unwavering gaze.

I didn’t overlook the slightest flicker in his eyes. I stood in front of him, perched on the edge of the desk.

“What are you doing…!”

“Give me a hug.”  

“……what?”

With shaky hands, I grabbed my skirt and tugged it up.

“Please…….”

His stare settled between my legs, in a private space. I parted my legs carefully, even though I was n*ked down below. His gaze was drawn to mine.    

“Hold me.”    

He abruptly sprang up, shoving her shoulder, and sent her sliding into the desk. He quickly unbuckled his pants and shoved his c*ck into her v*g*na.    

“Uhhhhhh.”    

The stretched-to-the-limit hole wrapped around his c*ck and devoured it.  His face twisted as if something snapped. He flexed his waist, grabbing his legs and slinging them over his shoulders.

With the impact, his body bounced up and down. He penetrated her v*g*na repeatedly while pulling up her t-shirt and bra. Her br*asts jiggled and bounced along with his thrusts.  

He bit his teeth on her br*ast, then s*cked on it, thrusting within her at breakneck speed. I can’t breathe and cling to his neck.

I put my hand over my racing heart, which was threatening to burst.  I raised my head to meet the gaze from above.    

“Ha… Did you betray my trust?”

“No…”

“Is there anything you want to tell me, or are you staying silent?”

“Yes.”

I gazed at him with a blank expression, and a practiced smile crossed my lips as I entwined my legs around his waist.

He took a brief pause, studying my face with great intensity. His thick eyebrows twitched as he attempted to decipher my intentions.

Although he remained still, I gently swayed around his waist, my hands cradling his cheeks as I drew him nearer. Just as our lips were about to meet, he uttered, “Hold me, so I can escape my thoughts.”

His ears turned crimson, and he grunted and gurgled. She bit her lower lip and opened it, gripping his neck and spreading her mouth wide.

My tongue twitched in sync with his rootless s*cking.  As the intense kiss burnt down my throat, my thoughts went into a trance. As he slammed into the root of my glans, his hips bucked, threatening to destroy the desk. 

He shuddered, sending shivers down my spine. My juices gushed out, soaking his clothes and my thighs, but I didn’t mind; I couldn’t even close my mouth because I was drooling from the pleasure he was giving me.  

He wraps my legs over his waist and licks my ankles, raising his upper body. With each violent thrust of his c*ck, her toes curled.

Her v*g*nal walls pushed against his shaft, but she didn’t let go as he bit down on the escaping shaft, s*cking the flesh away.    

“Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!”    

Thick pieces of flesh shook against my inner walls. His head jerked back. As I watched it drift through my body, he reinserted it. Blood rushed to every point he touched, making her entire body feel like an erogenous zone.  

My pupils dilated to the point where I couldn’t see him. His bite, which filled my inner walls, moved feverishly and quickly as if he were attempting to break me.

I screamed for help.  Something hot was on my stomach. He urinated on my stomach. His breathing was labored, and he murmured in my ear.    

“I can’t find anything.”

“…….”

“What are you hiding? What are you hiding?” My heart raced, but I couldn’t allow my tears to escape. I closed my eyes as he locked his gaze onto me, his eyes turning moist despite remaining tearless.    

* * *

We both shut our mouths, as we had agreed after the wild s*x at work. In the car, on the way home in the elevator. I swallowed many times dryly, sensing the strain in the air.  

I felt a lump in my throat and was more tight than I’d ever been during s*x. My shoulders were rigid and tense.

His hand slipped as he punched in the password, resulting in two errors. I walked inside as the door opened, and I could feel him close behind me.    

“Ugh!” he exclaimed before the door even closed.  

Before I heard the door close, he yanked at the nape of my neck and devoured my lips like an animal. I was obliged to return his kiss after being pushed back against the wall.

My legs buckled as he crushed against me, suffocating me.  But I didn’t want to leave. I undressed him while he undressed me. Because his shirt didn’t button properly, I tugged it open sideways, scattering buttons all over the floor.

After a little pause, he immediately lay them on the floor and inserted them, still not fully clothed.  

He pushed in, muttering softly.  I took a deep breath and gazed up at him. His sunken eyes pierce my face, his hips swinging swiftly.

With each deep insertion, she lets out a whimper.  She groaned, biting her breast into his mouth, as he elevated his head, driving her upper body higher. His eyes twinkle as he watches my wounded expression.

He popped a smashed n*pple into his mouth and s*cked on the side, the slurping sound of water underneath becoming louder with each stroke.  

Large hands seized her thighs and stretched them wide as he brought her legs together. He began to thrust his hips quickly, his gaze fixated below, his upper body erect.

His scorching look caused me to wriggle downward, gripping my flesh. To hold on, her v*g*nal walls constricted.    

“Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh.  

I’m not babbling, but the sight of my alter ego moving in and out of me causes my entire body to heat up.

Her p*ssy pressed even closer, sucking his c*ck to the root, as I wrapped my legs around his waist and slipped down, allowing him to wrap his legs around me.  

My brain seemed to be evaporating. I couldn’t think, all I could do was be held, held, held, like an animal. My alter ego slipped out with a low grunt, and I felt something hot in my stomach.

When he kissed me, I was still trying to catch my breath. I opened my mouth to allow his tongue more room.

The way he gently wrapped his tongue around it, teasing it below, seemed possessive. It was all an illusion, yet it felt that way.  

The hand that had been massaging my back shifted down to cup my inner thigh.  The sticky contact indicated that the s*x was not over.    

“Hold me.”   

I glanced at him as he leaned in close and sought to put his arms around my neck. His powerful arms wrap around my waist, and I rise, holding myself beneath his hips to avoid falling, as we stumble into the bedroom.

I wipe my cheeks and hide my face in the nape of my neck.  He puts me down on the bed with no effort, despite being sweaty and slick.

When the fluffy monster crawled on top of me and sank his teeth into the nape of my neck, he hadn’t even touched my back.    

“Ouch!”

I grimace in pain, moving my shoulder away, and he gently licks it. My eyes widen at what appears to be spit.    

“You’re not making marks, Hmph, don’t!”

It bit the edge of the mark I had just made before I could finish my sentence. There is no real animal.  When I refuse to respond, he sinks his fangs in instead.  

I push him away at first, but I get bored of his immobility. The nape of his neck, his collarbone, his entire chest, pelvis, and inner thighs.

My lips were parched from the constant pounding of his lips.  I glanced up helplessly as he branded himself on me from head to toe.  

I massaged his entire body and mashed my lips against his to taste him. Finally, I blinked quickly as he s*cked on the inside of my wrist.  

He smirked at the markings on my wrist as the heat between my legs made me squirm.    

I shook my head, “Are you begging me to put it in you?”

I didn’t even have the strength to say anything.  I taste him again as he spreads my legs. His eyes sparkle, and he pierces below as if unable to wait any longer.

Each action is cool as if his alter ego is rubbing a ticklish region.  My lower tummy was bursting at the seams with energy.

“Ugh, are you going to break it?”

I asked, my inner walls hardening as he tried to pull away, not that I was intentionally pushing.  He thrusts deeper by hooking one leg over my shoulder.

Slow, but not slow enough, I believe. My hips danced to the beat but eventually became a jumble. He dipped the tip in and wiggled it slightly after the rapid thrusts were followed by soothing breaths.  

Her juices flowed out with a gurgle, wetting her hip bones.  I cover my face in humiliation, and he gyrates his hips as he gets in.

There was just one way up, as his close contact and hip movement touched her sensitive clit.  I bite as hard as I can on his shoulder.    

“What.”

“Ha, don’t do that.”  

“Don’t do what?”

“That. Mmm. Now, that, ha, don’t do it!”    

I say it half-heartedly, and he makes a jilted sound and laughs. Tears welled up in my eyes. His lips wipe sympathetically, the corners of my eyes. My heart is racing.

I’m dazed by the furious thrusts of his hips as he thrusts into me with such vigor that I wonder why it feels so nice. I kiss him as I wrap my arms around his neck.

He opens his mouth to make room for my tongue.  I stroke his ears with my hands. I massaged the nape of his neck, my hands moving incessantly to memorize his eyes, nose, mouth, and everything else.

His eyes, heart, and the way he burned.  I gave everything I had to adore him, so I don’t have any regrets. I’m delighted I did. Hello, goodbye, and live happily ever after.

My mouth’s corners twitched. I folded my eyes and dragged the corners of my mouth together, aware of the inquisitive glances.

I believe I smiled cheerfully, but I’m not sure how he interpreted it. His gaze never left my face.  Hopefully, I wasn’t tragically smiling.    

* * *

“I’m running late, I’m running late!”

“I apologize.”

I catch sight of Miho pouting in front of me and give her cheek a strong pinch to shake myself out of it.

I had insisted on meeting a few days earlier because I needed to purchase Jiu a gift, but I had been pestering him all night and almost missed my flight.

Miho had rescheduled her plans to accompany me to the United States after I made the decision to leave. He remained mute as I squeezed her cheek.

He was nowhere to be seen when I awoke the next morning. I looked for him at the front door, in bed, in the bathroom, and even on the floor in front of the bathroom, but he was nowhere to be seen. He then showed up on the couch. We got caught in passionate embraces and swayed our bodies every time our eyes met.

Even a wild beast couldn’t match the intensity. My skin’s lasting marks pulsed with sensation. With sunken eyes, she looked around the airport.

“Are you feeling cold? Why are you wrapped up so tightly around your neck?”

“……I’m cold,” she confessed.

She chuckled harshly, massaging the back of her neck uncomfortably.  I went to see my dad yesterday. My brow furrowed at the thought of his beaming face wishing me a happy life, whatever that meant.    

“Did you tell the company?”

“I’m off work today…….”

I plan to send a message to Ms. Ha-Young tomorrow and ask her to check the drawer. I didn’t have a choice. He would find out if I resigned ahead of time. I felt awful for not informing him ahead of time.    

“…… Are you sure you’re okay?”

Miho, who stood alongside me, asked if I was okay as I nervously chewed my lip.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I said, and Miho breathed a sigh of relief when she saw my relaxed expression.

“Let’s go inside,” I said, nodding and moving around.

“Cha Se-yeon!” I yelled, hoping that the restless night would be worthwhile.

“Cha Soo-yeon!” I yelled, clenching my fist over the bag. I turned around and saw him running in the distance. Instead of being astonished, I had anticipated his absence. My lips curved into a gentle smile.

I locked my gaze on him, my breath raspy from the sprint. His normally well-kept hair was unkempt, and his tie hung awry.

“How did you find out?” I was curious.

“……Please, don’t leave,” he begged.

“…….” I paused.

“Where are you going, please don’t go,” he begged.

His fingers trembled slightly as he ran it through his hair in irritation.

“……why?” I inquired, looking for an explanation.

I’m relieved that my voice hasn’t changed. I was afraid it might sway like his trembling hand.

“I don’t know, I don’t know, but please don’t go,” he said.

His chest heaved, and he practically begged, “…Please, don’t go.”

I took a step closer, my breath pouring out in thick spurts, as his eyes flashed wildly. I kept staring at him from within arm’s reach.

“I’m not changing my mind,” I said emphatically.

“Cha Se-yeon,” he exclaimed, his voice fierce and sincere.

He reached out, a worried expression on his face. I shrugged off his shoulder and adjusted his crooked tie, but he grabbed my wrist.

The inside of my wrist ached from where he had held it the day before.

“Have a good life, I genuinely hope you do,” she went on to say.

I forced the corners of my mouth to form the most genuine smile I could muster. I prayed it wasn’t the last time I saw my tears.

“I want to live for myself,” I declared emphatically.

“…….”

“I want to find happiness.”

His grip on my wrist loosened. I turned to see him shaking his head.    

“Please…….”

“I’ll go.”

Miho, who was standing behind him, smiled sadly. I was about to ask why you look sadder, but then I bit my lip.

“Let’s go.”    

Miho didn’t answer, just strode toward him. I didn’t even think about grabbing him. I felt like I would burst into tears if I looked at him. Her fists clenched hard.    

“You shouldn’t have done that.”  I turned to see him shaking his head as his grip on my wrist loosened.

“Please…….”

“I’ll go,” I agreed.

Miho, who stood behind him, had a mournful expression on her face. I was about to inquire why she seemed much sadder, but I bit my lip instead.

“Let’s go.”

Miho didn’t respond and simply walked by him. I didn’t even think of contacting him. If I locked eyes with him, I was afraid I’d burst into tears. My fists were clenched.

“Excuse me?” she questioned.

“If the woman you loved so much suddenly wanted to break up with you, you should have tried to understand why. Instead of criticizing her, you should have looked for the reasons when you saw her again. If she left you for a better life and appeared exhausted, you should have tried to figure it out,” Miho went on to say.

“What do you mean?”

His reaction was so cold that he turned and grabbed Miho’s arm, his gaze fixed on the hand she was holding.

“Miho, please, stop it,” she begged.

Her voice was trembling with emotion. Miho yelled at him, clearly knowing of his goals and intentions.

“You’d better watch where you’re going, and I don’t want to see you,” Miho reprimanded.

He clenched his hands and scowled, his eyes flashing fiercely.

“Let’s go,” I murmured, letting Miho lead me into the immigration hall. I kept going without stopping, rejecting the need to look back.

“Are you okay?”

“…….” I said nothing.

I hadn’t even noticed the plane taking off, my gaze slowly shifting away from the pristine white clouds. Miho let out a sigh as she observed me staring out of the window. Tears trickled down my cheeks.

“Ugh… so frustrating. Hmph,” I grumbled, trying to suppress a sob, and Miho clicked her tongue in response and pulled the blanket over my head.

“Better be careful where you’re headed, and I don’t want to see you,” I recalled his words. His eyes had flashed dangerously as he clenched his fists and glared.

“Let’s go.”

I followed Miho’s hand into the immigration hall, moving forward without halting and fiercely avoiding the impulse to look back.

“Are you okay?”

“…….”

I hadn’t even noticed when the plane had taken off, my gaze gradually shifting away from the pure white clouds. Miho let out a sigh upon seeing me staring out of the window, and tears streamed down my cheeks.

“Ugh… it’s all so dark. Hmph,” I mumbled, hiding a sob in my throat, as Miho clicked her tongue and carefully wrapped the blanket around me.