Episode 15

‘Please, break up with Se-hyuk.’

‘…?’

What did I just hear? My eyes widened in disbelief. I gazed at Se-Hyuk’s sister, who was seated on the floor with her eyes wide open, her face a picture of desperation.

“You’re the reason Se-hyuk is hesitating about studying abroad at the moment.”

Her words sounded distant as if I were underwater.

“Break up with him.”

“I can’t. Sis… I can’t break up with him. I don’t want to,” I implored, my sobs even more heartbreaking than Si-Hyuk’s sister. I shook my head, my face contorting, and I saw a transformation in the look my sister directed at me as she knelt on the coffee shop floor, pleading.

The way her lips curled into a twisted smile sent shivers down my spine. It all felt like a lie.

A few months earlier, I had heard that their house had been destroyed, and his father was hospitalized. Concerned, Si-Hyuk’s sister had embraced me tightly, assuring me that it was nothing, but his trembling hands revealed a different story.

He had deceived me. He wasn’t okay. Even though it appeared to be nothing, I was unwilling to end our relationship, even if it was all based on deception.

“What can you do for Se-hyuk? Is there anything you can do for him? Anything at all?” she wanted to know.

‘…….’

“Why? Can’t love to be enough?” His sister rose from her kneeling position and took a seat in front of me, her face cold. She flipped her hair back and locked me with a piercing stare as if her kneeling had wounded her pride.

“Why? Because your family is wealthy? But that money isn’t yours to begin with. Can you help me now?”

‘Sister…’

I was at a loss for words, unable to ask why he was torturing me. Her gaze flitted. I thought she was friendly toward me during our brief encounters, but she wasn’t.

“I’m about to study abroad with the help of someone my father knows, but Se-hyuk won’t go because of you. Do you know what he did over the weekend? With the hand that usually held a pencil, he threw cement.”

My pupils dilated even more. I felt dizzy, and I wanted to scold him for wondering why I couldn’t see him without understanding the circumstances. I bit my bottom lip until it bled.

“As long as he let me go,” I replied, shaking my head, unable to comply.

“Sister, I’m sorry, I won’t let it happen again, but I… I can’t break up with him, I can never break up with him.”

She let out a deep sigh as I insisted that I couldn’t break away with him.

“You truly don’t understand. I hadn’t intended to mention this, but do you believe you could provide him with a child?”

‘……Uh, how……?’ I stammered, her revelation sending shivers through her entire body, not just her hands.

“Does it matter how I found out? It’s not even important to find out. Se-hyuk has wanted to have many children and create a stable family since he was a child. You know that, right? Isn’t it selfish to desire to fulfill something he’s always dreamt of, something you know you can’t do, and still want to be there for him? You’re so self-centered.”

‘Hmph…….’

‘All you need to do is let go! Right now, Se-hyuk claims to love you deeply, but ultimately, what do you think? You’re obstructing his path. Do you believe he won’t come to resent you?’

‘Ahem….’

Maybe she’s right. I have to let him live. I don’t interfere with his dreams; to let him go.

“Hmph……. Please……. Just let me be with him, by his side. Please………….. I love him. “

“Love? Don’t be ridiculous. You can’t even have a child, how dare you!”

My world crumbles. My heart feels like it’s being torn apart.

“The person who’s supposed to help me and Si-Hyuk said to come by this week. Think about it. Consider what you can do to make Se-hyuk happy.”

I’ve never seen such steely, determined eyes. As if she’d never give up. She gazed at her sister as she clenched her quivering hands together.

“Sis, I……. try to tell you that I can’t stay away from him, even if you shout at me.”

“Think about it. If you love Se-hyuk, what should you do? You’re not a child anymore.”

Why am I seeing Si-Hyuk’s face now, regretfully smiling as he tells me not to worry? I, the fool who never worried about money, insisted on going to a pricey restaurant yesterday, not comprehending how difficult it was for him. My chin jerked slightly.

‘Oh, your mother also gave Se-hyuk money in front of my mother. I’m not sure how Se-hyuk’s pride would have felt, but leave her alone to play princess for the sake of my brother’s future.”

‘………..’

‘Let’s never see each other again,’ she says.

I took a seat and watched her walk away. Should I follow her and get down to my knees and beg? I’ll do better next time, and I’ll bring her back and apologize.

No, I’ll disconnect from home. Should I beg, beg, beg for her to tell me that I don’t have to be separated from his brother?  

My chest tightened as my heart pounded. As if I’d sealed the hole, I couldn’t breathe. I never considered ending my relationship with him.

So, what should I do?  What should I do……  Tears flowed uncontrollably.  

“Cha Se-yeon! Cha Se-yeon!”

I awoke, my eyes fluttering open. I tried to see, but my vision remained blurred.

“Are you alright? Wake up,” a voice called out.

“It’s… Miho,” I strained to respond. My eyelids blinked rapidly, and a tear escaped, revealing Miho’s concerned expression. I finally managed to catch my breath.

“Haa… Miho.”

“Are you okay?” Miho inquired.

I simply stared, making no effort to wipe away my tears, and Miho gently wiped them away.

“…Yes. I’m alright.”

This was my new home. When I returned, I was quite ill, to the point where I couldn’t move a finger. I eventually gave Miho my address and asked her to get me some medication.

“I’m feeling unwell because I’ve been sneezing a lot and haven’t eaten enough.”

“…Jiu?” Se-Yeon inquired.

Every time I spoke, my throat stung as if it had been torn open.

“I traveled to America. I’ve returned briefly because I missed you.”

“That’s correct…”

You traveled such a long distance just to see me, even if it was just for a brief moment? I should have done the same. The excuse was merely a pretext.

“I’ll fetch you some porridge, and you can rest.”

“Yeah,” I said, closing my eyes and wiping the tears from my cheeks. I wiped tears away quickly, remembering the distrust in his look, which made the corners of my eyes ache.

Squinting, I softly caressed the corners of my eyes once again, but then I was startled by a commotion outside. As the sound became louder, I jumped to my feet, nearly losing my balance. My eyes widened in surprise when I opened the door. He was holding Miho.

“Don’t!”

I stretched out and grabbed his hand quickly. He gave me a cold, piercing stare before slapping my hand away and pushing me backward.

“You let a man into the house I saved, and you can’t stand him?” I shook my head as if he were treating me as if I were untrustworthy. His face had lost its color.

“No. I’ll explain everything… Just remove your hands from me.” She tried to approach him, but my vision was blurry. I leaned against the wall for support, feeling dizzy and about to collapse. He kept staring at me, and I hesitantly let grip of his hand.

“That’s the end of it,” I thought until Miho started screaming. I closed my eyes firmly and then opened them.

“Can’t you see her? Can’t you see how much she’s struggling?” She asked.

“Why should I care if she’s going through a tough time if she’s unhappy?” said Si-Hyuk.

“You seem to be the most cruel, don’t you?”

“Miho… Don’t,” I interjected, but Se-yeon’s voice was too weak to reach me.

“No! Look at who’s really struggling right now! Are you being unwell? That’s ridiculous; it’s nothing compared to what she’s suffering…”

“Choi Miho!” I shouted with all the effort I could muster. Miho remained silent and gave me a stern stare.

“Please, don’t… Please, stop… Huh?” she said as she dropped to the floor.

“Are you okay, Se-Yeon?” he said, pushing around Miho to take up her weak body and carry her inside the room.

“You should go,” I suggested to Miho.

A silky sheet caressed at my back. I carefully closed my eyes, only to open them to see piercing black eyes analyzing my face.

His glance seemed to be able to see right into my soul. I closed my eyes, unable to hide my discomfort. The weight of his obliviousness to his acts felt to choke me.

I longed for him to leave. Or, to put it another way, I wished I could find the words to say, but I stayed speechless. I held the covers with quivering fists, unable to swallow.

I could feel his intense gaze on me, but I stubbornly kept my eyes closed.

“Wait a minute,” he mumbled, his voice low and slightly annoyed. I heard him rise and opened my eyes warily to see his departing figure.

“……”

Sister,

I was young at the time. If I could go back in time and make that decision again, despite the terrible remorse it caused, I would do it the same way. I would have taken that rash decision, convinced that it would bring him happiness and that it was for the greater good.

His father died two days after I departed. I saw him being harassed by debt collectors at his funeral, and it became clear to me. I needed to set this man free, to let him grow his wings and fly free.

* * *

“Eat.”

He briefly left the room and returned with something in his hand and an intensity in his stare. He sat in the chair in front of the bed and stretched a spoon toward me.

“Eat.”

“……I’m not hungry.”

His lips clenched, and he continued to examine my face. I averted my gaze, nervous under his sight, when his fingers quickly seized my chin, compelling me to confront his gaze.

“What’s the matter? I’ve lost my appetite…”

His voice faded away. He sighed as he looked down at his own bulging eyes.

Despite my desire for him to smile, he can only send me a sigh. I can’t remember the last time I saw him smile.

The image of him crying, screaming at me not to go, is embedded in my heart and I can’t get it out.    

“What, what are you doing?”

“Hold still,”

I stuttered as he suddenly pulled my t-shirt off over my head.    

“Don’t do it!”

I yelled, but he didn’t move and took my bra off. His gaze fell on my n*pples, which had been aching all night, and they spontaneously stood up.

I raised my hands to conceal my br*asts. I stare at him, not sure what he’s up to, as he pushes my shoulders down to the bed.

I felt silly for being moved by his insignificant gesture of placing his hand on the back of my neck.  

I was curious how many times he’d done this without allowing me to sleep, and if it wasn’t enough.

“You’re pissed. Lie down.”

His tone was flat and concerned. His gaze narrowed, and a languid corner of his mouth raised. The hairs on the back of my neck stand on end as if he’s wondering what I’m thinking.

In humiliation, I pull the covers over my head. I unnecessarily wiggled my toes. I heard him leave the room and looked his way out of the corner of my eye.  

My eyelids weighed down due to sleep deprivation, and my body radiated warmth, as he had mentioned. I shut my eyes as I sensed someone guiding me to the ground.

After a brief moment, a cold sensation grazed my forehead, prompting me to open my eyes.

“Have some porridge; you shouldn’t be having medicine.”

I remained silent. Sleep had left my throat hoarse, making it difficult to speak. My eyes teared up, and my nose ran as he used a towel to wipe away the sweat from my forehead and the back of my neck.

“Please eat, even if you’re not feeling hungry,” he advised. I responded with a nod instead of words.

I shifted my weight, resting against the head of the bed, appreciating his support. When I pulled the sheet up over my head, I was taken aback by the intensity of his gaze on my chest, and he chuckled with amusement.

“I’m not so famished that I’d consider eating someone unwell, am I?”

I had embraced him countless times, so it was only fair. While eating my porridge, I made sure to finish every last bit because he was observing me closely.

“Here you go,” he offered.

He placed the pill in my mouth and passed me a cup. I took a deep gulp, swallowing the pills, all the while his intense, jet-black eyes locked onto mine.

I tried to act as though I hadn’t noticed, but my heart raced so rapidly that it felt like it might explode. The fever had sapped my strength, and in my delirium, I mistakenly believed he was concerned about me.

I rubbed my tired eyes and let out a groan. He firmly seized my wrist and gently pulled it away as I squinted through eyes moistened with tears.

“Don’t make contact with me,” she murmurs in a hushed tone, and with each word, my heart thuds even louder, like it’s on the verge of bursting.

I place a hand on my chest, and he tilts his head.

“Is it hurting?” he inquires.

“Oh, no!”

I say, but he appears to believe I’m lying. He grabs my hand and looks at my chest, which he had just pressed down on.

My face was very red.  I covered my chest with my other hand, which he also dragged down. Like twigs in the wind, his eyes flickered wistfully.    

“That must hurt.”

“Mmm,” he whispered, brushing his tongue over my br*ast. I didn’t think to push him away as he licked both br*asts as if I couldn’t see, as if I were dying of pity.

I looked at him blankly as he licked my n*pples, not realizing he’d let go of my hand. I was tickled between the legs by his l*cking of my protruding n*pple.

As I sobbed, he bit his lip and gazed at me, the corner of my mouth lifted.  

“I put saliva on it, so it should be okay.”

“Hey, this……. Ew!” I screamed.

“What are you doing?” I mumbled, my words muffled by the cold washcloth as he gently wiped my neck, chest, and armpits. He swiftly moved to clean my inner thighs and then pulled the sheet up to cover me up to my neck.

I felt myself growing weaker as I drifted into a dazed state, but I could still sense his eyes fixed on me. I opened and closed my mouth several times, wondering if he had something to say.

The coolness of his large palm on my forehead brought a smile to my face, but inexplicably, tears welled up in my eyes. The hand that wiped them away was so tender that it prompted even more tears.

Or the hand that caressed my hair. It was such a comforting touch that, if I hadn’t fallen asleep, I might have shed tears into it.

Upon awakening to the sound of the alarm, I noticed he hadn’t left. I stood in the living room, surveying the empty house.

“When did he depart?” I wondered aloud.

I inquired, scanning the area and finding no sign of him as if his presence had been an illusion. My heart sank, even though it shouldn’t have.

It dawned on me once more how foolish I had been to believe I could part ways cleanly after spending ten nights together. The pain now cut deeper than it had six years ago. For a long moment, I stood frozen, unable to take a single step forward.

* * *

“How are you?”

“You look even more beautiful today.”

“Thank you,” she responded, and Ms. Ha-Young playfully nudged her arm, as if emphasizing her beauty, even if it was just a playful gesture.

“Hi.”

The corner of my mouth that had lifted upon his arrival now lowered. I stood up and respectfully bowed, and without a word, he entered the boss’s office.

“There’s a bit of a chill in the air, Ms. Se-yeon. Could you please bring me some coffee?”

“It’s…” I started to reply but paused, leaving the response unfinished.

“Why has the boss been in such a foul mood lately?” I asked.

She provided a vague response and then headed for the restroom. I had a feeling I knew why the boss was in a bad mood, and I sighed while preparing the coffee.

However, I couldn’t bring myself to tell Ms. Ha-Young that it was because of me. Yesterday, I had thought he was warm, but today, he didn’t even spare a glance at me when I arrived at work, even for a brief moment.

I hesitated to enter the boss’s office, imagining him being as cold as he appeared today.

“Come in,” the boss called.

But there was no escaping it. I knocked on the door and heard the boss’s low voice inviting me in. Just that alone was enough to make my fingertips tremble.

“Thank you.”

“Yes. I’ll be right out.”

I carefully placed my coffee cup on the desk without making a sound. I picked up the tray and glanced at him, but his attention remained focused on the papers. As I excused myself and prepared to leave, he gave a nod of acknowledgment.

“What’s the matter?” I shake my head and open the door. I manage to catch a glimpse of him before he shuts it, but his head is bowed, concealing his expression.

He’s engrossed in his work, not even sparing a glance when we cross paths. It’s been a week already. Even when we found ourselves alone in the office, whether it was over a potted plant or a cup of coffee, he never directed his gaze toward me.

As the week goes by, it becomes apparent that he’s deliberately avoiding me. There are only two nights left, and I haven’t received any communication from him.

One of the plants is withering, prompting me to enter his office to administer some nutrients, but today he doesn’t spare me a second look. I cast a sidelong glance at him as he immerses himself in his paperwork, and he raises his head as if sensing my gaze.

“Do you need to use the restroom?” he inquires.

“……No.”    

When we’re alone in the office, he isn’t the same person who used to attempt to harass or make physical contact in any way possible. He’s not warm, not cold; he’s just lukewarm. It feels more like he doesn’t care at all, and it stings.

“Get out.”

“It’s…” I began to explain, but I ended up bowing to his businesslike demeanor and hurriedly left the boss’s office, my face flushed with embarrassment. I set the tray down in the break room and took a deep breath.

I must have been hoping for some sign of acknowledgment from him.

“No expectations,” I reminded myself.

It’s just a contract, after all, but my spirits plummeted, sinking into a deep abyss. I felt terrible.

I made sure to charge my tablet, and I kept my papers organized, but I didn’t feel any better after work. So, I decided to buy a beer and head home.

As I mulled over the numbers of the elevator floors, which were rapidly climbing, I reached the twelfth floor. The elevator doors opened with a “ding,” and I tensed.

“Oh, hello?” I blurted out, feeling like a complete fool.

How could I say hello when she was giving me a hostile glare, far from a friendly greeting? I clenched my hand, holding the bag tightly.

“We need to talk.”

“Okay,” I replied, somewhat apprehensive.

I had anticipated that he might eventually approach me. I didn’t expect it to happen so quickly, but perhaps he was running a week behind schedule. My hand shook as I entered the access code. The door opened, and his sister stepped into the house first.

She had aged, but her demeanor, her cold words, and her unrelenting gaze remained the same. I could sense that she still harbored resentment towards me, making me hesitant to step inside.

With a smile that seemed fragile, ready to break at any moment, I kicked off my shoes, my shoulders tensing at the sound of the door closing behind me.

“Take a seat.”

“Charado…”

“Are we here to have tea?” I settled on the floor, my expression tinged with annoyance.

“You work for the Royal Group?”

“It’s…”

“Se-hyuk gave you this house?”

“It’s…”

“You claimed to have paid off the debt?”

I couldn’t bring myself to lift my head. My palms were clammy with sweat, and I couldn’t wipe them off.

“What’s your connection?” she finally asked, raising her gaze. Her cold eyes were filled with scorn, forcing my breath to freeze in my throat.

“No, no, no, no.”

It took me a few attempts to find my voice.

“Se-hyuk has been working tirelessly. He’s now the president of Royal Group. He hasn’t had more than two hours of sleep in years. I imagine he still doesn’t.

He’s been cutting back on sleep and taking on every part-time job he can find in his pursuit of success. He was fortunate enough to catch the chairman’s attention and become the president, but he’s still pushing himself to the limit.”

“…”

“That’s why you’re always the first one to wake up.”

“To obstruct him, and because of you…”

I could discern the excitement in her eyes. Oddly, my heart, which had been racing just moments ago, began to settle.

“I thought you said your house was in disrepair. Is this the right time? An accomplished ex-boyfriend? It’s an interesting twist, but…”

“Sis,” I interrupted for the first time, locking eyes with her.

“We’re not together. There’s nothing to be concerned about, truly.”

“…You want me to believe that?”

“If you don’t want to believe it, I can’t force you, but it’s the truth.”

Her eyes roved over my face, seeking the truth, and I returned her gaze without hesitation. I felt no fear at all.

“Don’t stress over it.”

“Do you find this situation amusing?”

“…I do.”

I managed a wistful smile. Confronting the reality I had been trying so hard to evade, I couldn’t even muster the tears I expected.

I had a vague sense that I should move on from him, but once I had resolved to do so, I felt no fear anymore.

“So you don’t have to come to see me. I won’t be an obstacle.”

“…”

“Could you please leave? I’m exhausted.”

I ran my hand over the cool skin at the nape of my neck. The marks he had left were gone, but I could still sense their tingling presence.