She peered down. It was pitch black, and she could barely make out anything, but the faint moonlight revealed a grove of blackthorns beneath the jagged cliffs.

“…….”

What if she threw herself out that window right now? She knew she wouldn’t die easily. But from this high up, maybe…….

Suddenly, she was overcome by an unknown impulse, a cold sensation running down her spine that turned into an unstoppable frenzy. Thrilling goosebumps crawled down her skin. It’s maddeningly tempting. With trembling hands, she grip the window frame.

“What are you doing?”

Then there was a hand behind her, pulling her down, and she recognized it by the voice and the warmth. It was Ragnar.

“Oh, it’s nothing.”

For a moment, Christa realized what she was about to do.

“Really?”

She stiffened, though she couldn’t hear the same anger in his voice.

“I was just wondering what it was like down there.”

Anxiety seeped into his hard voice.

“Is that what it is?”

“Y, yes.”

Christa found it hard to look Ragnar in the eye, so she tilted her head and traced the stone patterns on the floor.

“If you fall, you’ll hurt yourself badly.”

With that, he scooped her up and carried her away from the window.

“I, I’m…….”

She felt embarrassed that she’d been caught being silly, but at the same time, she was glad to see him after so long. Their paths had not been crossing a lot lately.

Until now, no matter how busy they were, they could always find each other in the bedroom at night, but for the past few days Christa hadn’t been able to wake up. Actually, the problem was with her.

She bit her lip a few times, then made up her mind. She had to check in with him. If not now, then when would she ever see him again?

“By any chance, are you still…… upset?”

Ragnar replied in surprise.

“Upset?”

His voice lacked the sharp, blunt edge she had heard before. That gave her the courage to ask a more direct question.

“I mean, you didn’t even look at me.”

As she spoke, she could feel his frustration rise. He cringed and his eyes grew cold.

“You’re already sleeping when I get back.”

“Well, lately I’ve been…….”

Again and again, being sleepy sounded like an excuse, and this time Ragnar turned to her.

“Rather, it’s me who thought you were angry.”

“M, me?”

Christa looked up into his eyes, startled by the unexpected question. Angry— it’s not an emotion she’s capable of expressing. How dare she be angry with him?

“Of course not.”

Ragnar laughs softly at that. Somehow, seeing that smile makes her frozen anxiety melt away like ice.

She’d wanted to die earlier, and now she was actually glad. She’d never felt such an intense fluctuation of emotions before, and she felt a small wave of embarrassment wash over her.

Ragnar’s voice was sweet as honey.

“You kept looking so tired, I couldn’t wake you.”

“Next time, just wake me up.”

His hand curls around her waist, insistent. She hadn’t felt this warmth in a long time. She blinked urgently to keep from tearing up.

“No matter how many times I’ve tried to wake you, you never wake up.”

“Well, that can’t be……. What else did you do?”

She tried to turn around in surprise, but she was now being held so tightly that she couldn’t squirm and had to stay still.

“How lonely it was to guard you every night, staring at your sleeping face…….”

“T, that…….”

She can’t verify the authenticity of his words, but it made her feel better. She felt like she wasn’t alone in her thoughts, feelings, loneliness, and sadness.

Of course, he could be lying. But it was hard to hide how excited she was. A smile slowly formed at the corners of Christa’s mouth.

At the same time, she can still feel his lips on the back of her neck. Goosebumps run down her spine.

Christa’s face was now flushed, as if she’d been painted a deep red. She’s feverish and lightheaded.

It was a relief to be so close to him now, even if he wasn’t guiding her. It felt so good to breathe his scent into her lungs, to feel his body heat soak into her skin and make her feel hot.

“That ring was……. Oh, it was my mother’s…… keepsake.”

Christa wanted to tell him what had been eating away at her for days, but it wasn’t easy with him constantly nibbling at the back of her neck.

“I don’t know why His Royal Highness had it, but…….”

But he groped steadily, as if he didn’t hear her.

“Enough about that.”

“Ha, but…….”

“You should be focusing on this.”

She’s getting out of breath. The sound of wetness licking her earlobe is erotic. The sound of a wet tongue invading her earlobe makes her shiver.

A lively heat tickles her navel. Until finally, she can’t think at all.

* * *

The next day, the bed was still empty. Hilda and Annette came in as soon as the curtains were drawn.

“Madame, you’re looking good this morning!”

Annette greeted me cheerfully.

“I’ve had a good night’s rest so I’m feeling better.”

As always, it was quite embarrassing to greet them in the morning. Christa dipped her hands in the lukewarm wash water.

“Ragnar is still at……..”

“The Duke is out on an inspection, as the mood here is rather serious these days.”

The mood in the castle had become more murderous since that day. Ragnar knew.

“Everyone’s on edge now that the crown prince is suddenly in the north.”

Annette agreed that everyone was on edge.

“Is it because the crown prince is in the north?”

Christa asks, and Hilda replies.

“Well, it happened ten years ago, so it’s a sensitive subject…….”

“Hilda, you can’t say that…….”

Annette interrupted Hilda. But Hilda shook her head.

“By now, my lady should know the situation here.”

It was probably something about Ragnar and the Regent.

“If it was ten years ago, I have some idea of what happened.”

They said something similar to Margrethe.

“It’s not that I didn’t tell you on purpose, but as you’ve heard, it was really bad here back then…….”

“No one wants to talk about it. When the Regent took control of the North, it was a living hell.”

Taxes were harsh and food was scarce. Some people abandoned their children because they were starving. It was a difficult time, she says.

“I was very young, but I remember vividly how harsh and bitter the winter was.”

“If the duke hadn’t saved the north…… we might have all starved to death.”

“Ragnar…….”

She remember the faces of the crowd that greeted him as he rode into town. It was as if they were seeing their savior, which is why they were so happy to see him.

In the back of her mind, she felt a twinge of bitterness, a pity for his childhood, which hadn’t gone so well. She had once been under the illusion that he had had nothing but good days.

Ragnar was such a strong man, she realized, that he didn’t shy away from difficulties or sound weak. She knew that, but it made her feel a little lonely.

“No wonder the Duke is so busy, then.”

“Yes…….”

A lonely, pitiful feeling washed over her. But she had to hold it in. She clutched the front of her dress tightly in her chest.

* * *

“This is the report.”

Mervin took the papers from the spy. It contained speculation on how the crown prince had come to the north and a report on his subsequent behavior.

Ragnar didn’t need to read it, however, to make a good guess as to where the crown prince was staying.

“Perhaps, he is where my aunt is.”

“Well, where else could he be?”

Mervin Ferride finalized the document and handed it to Ragnar. He was at Varus, as expected.

“I should have executed the whole family then, too.”

“……Hmm.”